“But there was fightin’ in other places besides Bexar. We heard there was a fight at La Bahía. He might’ve been killed.”

“Does Marie believe he’s dead?”

“No. She says she knows he’s alive. She says she can sense it.”

“Then listen to Marie and not your fears.” He looked around. “I figured I’d find Sly Shipman with you. Where’s he at?”

She looked at the ground. “He’s gone, wouldn’t you know? He went back with Baptiste.”

He saw the hurt in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Annie. I had figured you and him would be married by now.”

The hurt turned to a flash of resentment. “Me, marry a man who’s always up and gone when you need him the most? I wouldn’t have him as a gift.” She turned away, but not before he saw tears well up in her eyes.

“It’s cold out here,” she said. “Go take care of your horse, then come on in and get warm. I’ll be fixin’ you somethin’ to eat.”

XXI

CHRISTMAS WAS not happy for the Lewises on the Colorado River. The weather was damp and unpleasantly cold, and the threat of war still hung over Texas like the leaden clouds of winter. Worst of all for the Lewises was that Michael had not been heard from. Though James would not speak of it to anyone else, least of all to Marie, he was haunted by a fear that Michael had fallen somewhere in one of the scattered skirmishes the Texans and the lately arrived American volunteers had fought with Mexican soldiers from Goliad to the Rio Grande before General Cós’s retreat from Bexar.

If that were so, he would join many of the other pioneers to early Texas who had been swallowed up by that vast land and never seen again. James grieved inwardly when he was alone, but he tried not to betray his feelings around the others, except for Andrew. Somehow he felt that with Andrew he could unburden himself, for Andrew had always been the one in the immediate family most able to listen with sympathy, to understand, to offer advice, and help without impatience.

Andrew heard James’s fears about their older brother with eyes that could not hide misgivings of his own. He said, “I’ve had the same thoughts. I’ve tried to push them aside because it seems disrespectful to think of him as gone, like Papa that time. I remember when we thought once before that Michael was dead, but he finally turned up, when old Eli Pleasant brought him back to Tennessee. You weren’t big enough to remember much about it, I guess. Marie still swears she knows he’s alive, says she can sense that he’s out there somewhere, tryin’ to get home. I guess from there we have to take it on faith. Whatever comes, we’ll face it as a family.”

The Reverend Fairweather came by on Christmas Day and shared with them some venison and wild turkey at Andrew’s cabin, where all the families had gathered. “The Lord’s bounty is generous indeed,” he said, and led them in a prayer for the safety of Texas and for the return of all the missing, especially Michael.