I knew I should’ve walked away. I should’ve ended training the first second I felt her aether calling out to me. Fuck. I should’ve ended these trainings the first time I found myself wanting what I should never ever want from her. There was a lot of shit I should’ve done, but I didn’t listen.

“Fuck,” I grunted, turning around as I stepped to the side. I leaned against the wall, tipping my head back. “Fuck.”

I’d lost control today.

When she’d gotten angry and used the air element, it hit me right in the gut. It had also turned me on, because whenever Josie got pissed, I couldn’t help but find it hot. But when she tapped into akasha, the rush of power that permeated the air had dragged me under.

There had been no room for warnings or thoughts or seconds to consider what I was doing. I’d become a ball of action, of a thousand different things, and somewhere lust and need and want got all mixed up.

I’d wanted to give her pleasure.

I’d wanted to get in her.

I’d wanted what was in her.

Gods. It all got mixed up. No excuse. None whatsoever. I didn’t even realize what I was doing until it was too late, until I felt the ebb and flow of aether, moving from her to me.

I’d fed off her.

Gut twisting, I closed my hands into fists. I’d fed off Josie, off someone who trusted me irrevocably. It was the worst kind of betrayal, and she didn’t even know. She had no idea why she’d been so tired afterward. No clue to the cause behind the fact she couldn’t even finish eating a basket of fries.

I’d done it, and even though I hadn’t been thinking and I wasn’t even sure if that was the main reason why I’d gone after her today, I still knew what had happened to her. The daimons had fed on her before we reached her grandparents’ house. Hyperion had gotten her outside of their house, and even though she wouldn’t talk about what had gone down when he had her, I knew he would’ve fed on her. After all, that was why the Titans were after the demigods in the first place. For Hyperion it was also personal. And I’d done to Josie the same thing he had.

That was unforgivable.

I had to be stronger and I wasn’t. I’d failed. And if she knew what I’d done, she would be absolutely disgusted with me. I couldn’t blame her for that. I deserved her repulsion and hatred.