Seth’s hands shook—his hands. Hands that were always so steady in battle, but they trembled now, touching me. “I don’t deserve that from anyone, but especially from you.” Voice rough and heavy, he searched my face intently. “That is a precious gift that I . . . that I am not worthy of.”

I sucked in air. Oh gosh, that hurt. Hearing him say that tore me up, ripped me right apart, and it struck me then. I knew why he had backed off. Him pushing me away had nothing to do with Alex or with me. It was because of him, because of how he believed he deserved nothing more than punishment.

That he sincerely believed that the only thing he had was to atone for his past sins.

Tears pricked my eyes as I folded my hands over his wrists. I had to prove what he believed wasn’t true.

Prove that he was the total of everything he’d done and not just the dark things he was ashamed of, and I would do so, because I loved him and accepted him for who he was, for all his faults. That was what love meant.

Love fostered courage.

Stretching up on the tips of my toes, I braced myself, gripped his wrists tighter and leaned in, kissing him softly. He stiffened and then tried to pull back, but I followed, the whole time my stomach twisting and fluttering like a hundred hummingbirds had taken flight.

“You’re wrong,” I told him, settling back on my feet. “You’re so wrong about so much, Seth.”

Thick lashes lowered, shielding those extraordinary eyes that held a wealth of secrets. I lowered his hands and started walking backward, toward his bedroom. I didn’t let myself think of what I was doing, what I was about to initiate.

“You deserve me,” I told him, and he didn’t argue. He appeared to be struck silent. “I’ve told you that before, in this very room. I wasn’t lying then. Nothing has changed. You deserve me.”

He flinched once more. “Josie, I—”

I silenced him with a kiss and I threw everything I was feeling into it, every ounce of love and hope and all the hurt I felt when he’d pushed me away and all the ache his words created now. I kissed him like I would never do it again.

“You’re worthy of love.” My pulse was all over the place as I pushed him back and down on the edge of the bed. “You’re more than worthy of my love.”

Seth watched me with bright eyes as I placed a knee on either side of him and climbed into his lap. I lowered myself down and I felt him, hard and straining against the rough material of his tactical pants.