CECILY: Yes, Uncle Jack. Good-bye, Cousin Ernest. I am afraid I shan’t see you again, as I shall be doing my lessons with Miss Prism in the drawing-room at half-past three.

ALGERNON: Good-bye, Cousin Cecily. You have been very kind to me.

CECILY goes out.

JACK: Now look here, Algy. You have got to go, and the sooner you go the better. Bunbury is extremely ill, and your place is by his side.

ALGERNON: I can’t go at the present moment. I must first just have my second lunch. And you will be pleased to hear that Bunbury is very much better.

JACK: Well, you will have to go at three-fifty, at any rate. I ordered your things to be packed and the dog-cart to come round.

ACT DROP

Act Three

SCENE: The drawing-room at the Manor House. CECILY and MISS PRISM discovered; each writing at a separate table.

MISS PRISM: Cecily! (CECILY makes no answer.) Cecily! You are again making entries in your diary. I think I have had occasion more than once to speak to you about that morbid habit of yours.

CECILY: I am merely, as I always do, taking you for my example, Miss Prism.

MISS PRISM: When one has thoroughly mastered the principles of Bimetallism one has the right to lead an introspective life. Hardly before. I must beg you to return to your Political Economy.

CECILY: In one moment, dear Miss Prism. The fact is I have only chronicled the events of to-day up till two-fifteen, and it was at two-thirty that the fearful catastrophe occurred.

MISS PRISM: Pardon me, Cecily, it was exactly at two-forty-five that Dr. Chasuble mentioned the very painful views held by the Primitive Church on Marriage.

CECILY: I was not referring to Dr. Chasuble at all. I was alluding to the tragic exposure of poor Mr. Ernest Worthing.

MISS PRISM: I highly disapprove of Mr. Ernest Worthing. He is a thoroughly bad young man.

CECILY: I fear he must be. It is the only explanation I can find of his strange attractiveness.

MISS PRISM (rising): Cecily, let me entreat of you not to be led away by whatever superficial qualities this unfortunate young man may possess.

CECILY: Ah! Believe me, dear Miss Prism, it is only the superficial qualities that last. Man’s deeper nature is soon found out.

MISS PRISM: Child! I do not know where you get such ideas. They are certainly not to be found in any of the improving books that I have procured for you.

CECILY: Are there ever any ideas in improving books? I fear not. I get my ideas…in the garden.

MISS PRISM: Then you should certainly not be so much in the open air. The fact is, you have fallen lately, Cecily, into a bad habit of thinking for yourself. You should give it up. It is not quite womanly…Men don’t like it.

Enter ALGERNON.

Mr. Worthing, I thought, I may say I was in hopes that you had already returned to town.