Contents ( 42)
- Dedication
- Contents
- Part One
- The Truth
- 1. May
- 2. May
- 3. June
- Part Two
- Summer Holidays
- 4. July
- 5. August
- 6. October
- Part Three
- Watching the Grown-Ups
- 7. October
- The Night After the Party
- 8. November
- Three Weeks After Ash’s Death
- 9. November
- Part Four
- Damage
- 10. November
- 11. November
- 12. November
- Part Five
- Disguises
- 13. November
- 14. November
- 15. March
- Part Six
- Friendship
- 16. April
- 17. April
- 18. April—Same Day
- 19. May
- 20. December
- Epilogue
- Acknowledgments
- About the Author
- Also by Jane Shemilt
- Copyright
- About the Publisher
His praise hooks her back, still. She moves closer and holds her hands out. “Smell, right here. Does it remind you of anything?”
“You know I can’t stand perfume.” He frowns.
“It’s just grass, not perfume. It took me back to that tennis club where we—”
“Can you wash it off before bed?” He picks up his glass. “I ate at work; I’ve got accounts to go over.”
She’s not going to cry, it’s her fault; she picked the wrong moment. He’s tetchy with tiredness, that’s all. Lina is laying out their food in the kitchen: pink salmon, green broccoli, and tiny new potatoes.
“Please eat with me, Lina, Paul’s busy.”
Lina sits down obediently. She must wonder why Melissa is so often on her own and why their house seems empty of friends. Melissa pushes her potatoes to one side. The stark truth is that she doesn’t invite friends around, or go out with them, because her husband doesn’t want her to.
“I simply want to spend time with my wife at the end of a busy day,” he’d said, sipping wine. “Fair enough, surely?” She’d nodded, but the days had become weeks, months, then years. The friends had stopped phoning, stopped coming around. She touches the peonies that Lina has put in a vase on the table, a splash of scarlet against the gray; the petals feel very soft. The days are different now; there are Sundays to look forward to, conversation and laughter. The whole week feels warmer, richer, more colorful. It must be the same for Izzy.
Melissa smiles at Lina. “It seems crazy we don’t know more about your family after all this time, Lina. Tell me about them.”
Lina shakes her head, perhaps she doesn’t understand.
“Your father, for instance. What does he do?”
“He is dead,” Lina says after a pause, turning her head to the window. Melissa puts down her fork, walks around the table, and sits next to Lina, slipping an arm around her shoulders.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart.” She feels guilty for having stirred the memories, guilty for not having discovered them before.
“The war.” Lina makes a horizontal movement with her hand, as if sweeping something away.
After a while, Lina gets up and they clear the table together in silence, but one that feels companionable. When they finish Melissa makes two cups of tea. Lina picks hers up with a little bow and walks softly from the kitchen.
Melissa checks her watch, it’s late. Paul will be in bed, waiting. She hurries upstairs in a panic and stands in the shower for a long time, soaping her wrists again and again.
Poppy tells Izzy her secrets because Izzy listens; she says she wants to know all about the family. Izzy thinks Mum doesn’t look after things properly.
“Look at that ring your mother wears,” she says. “She’s got bits of food stuck in it like she’s been cooking with it on. She doesn’t give a toss about anything. It’s all a mess in your house.”