“My mom never knew the whole story. But she thought it had something to do with my grandmother, Deepa. She thought Deepa had planted some idea in him.”

Deepa herself had little connection to the subcontinent. Her parents had died in India, tragically, it seemed. She hadn’t been back in decades. That was all Shan knew about her father’s family history. It was otherwise a vacuum, empty of details, names of places or dates, far more mystery than fact. Was this why Shan had felt so rudderless in life, because she had no family tree on her father’s side to root her?

“Is Deepa still alive?” Chandani asked. “Are you still in touch?”

“After my father died, my mom left her several messages, wrote her a bunch of letters, sent her photos of me. She never responded. At least, that’s my mother’s side of the story. I have no idea whether Deepa’s still alive. I wouldn’t even know where or how to begin to look for her.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that Shan.”

“Thank you, Aunty.”

Shan took a deep breath. Exhaled. A breeze kicked up, brushed through the petals framing the pond. She took it all in, the gentle sounds of trickling water, chirping birds, the rustling leaves. The Earth Goddess’s outstretched hand was an offering, a blessing, an absolution, perhaps, that Shan hadn’t realized she needed.

A couple pushing a stroller walked by. The baby had black hair, fists pumping in the air. Thinking about babies the past several days had been so painful for her. The smile this infant brought to her face surprised her.

Chandani glanced at the stroller and then looked at Shan. “Have you thought about naming your baby? He was your son, and he will always be your son. A name might give you a little bit of closure.”

The thought had never occurred to Shan—to name a baby she’d been pregnant with for barely three months. But naming her baby would mark his place in her family history.

“Just think about it,” Chandani said, before Shan could answer. She then rose and offered Shan her arm.

Shan looped hers through it. They turned and walked slowly away from the Earth Goddess, toward another part of the gardens. As they did, a ray of light escaped between clouds and shined upon their faces.

Shan didn’t realize how exhausted she was until Chandani dropped her off back home. She kicked off her shoes, climbed the stairs, headed down the hallway to the room that would have been the baby’s. A full-size bed was pushed up against the wall. A small desk sat in front of the window. They’d planned on moving the furniture to the basement to make room for a crib and changing table. It would all stay put now, in the forever guest bedroom.