Chapters (48)
- Cover
- Praise
- About the Author
- Also by Tricia Stringer
- Title Page
- Dedication
- One
- Two
- Three
- Four
- Five
- Six
- Seven
- Eight
- Nine
- Ten
- Eleven
- Twelve
- Thirteen
- Fourteen
- Fifteen
- Sixteen
- Seventeen
- Eighteen
- Nineteen
- Twenty
- Twenty-One
- Twenty-Two
- Twenty-Three
- Twenty-Four
- Twenty-Five
- Twenty-Six
- Twenty-Seven
- Twenty-Eight
- Twenty-Nine
- Thirty
- Thirty-One
- Thirty-Two
- Thirty-Three
- Thirty-Four
- Thirty-Five
- Thirty-Six
- Thirty-Seven
- Thirty-Eight
- Author’s Note
- Acknowledgements
- Excerpt
- One
Last night and today she’d run on autopilot, with her head full of swirling thoughts and her body, her betraying body, numb. None of the others seemed to notice. Her mother would have but she wasn’t here. Gone off on a sudden holiday with Aunty Brenda. Dad had muttered something about her needing a break.
A tear rolled down Kate’s cheek and she batted it away. She badly wanted her mother here, to tell her what the doctor had said, to feel the reassurance of her mother’s arms around her.
Dr Strauss had gone over her with a fine-tooth comb and had thought there was little wrong with her but had ordered blood tests and taken a urine sample. That had produced the shock. The doctor was sure the blood test results would confirm what the urine test had revealed: Kate was pregnant. Dear, kind Dr Strauss had been delighted for her and Kate had been in too much shock to ask any questions.
Now her head was brimming with them. Why, after years of infertility, would her body suddenly decide it was fertile? She and Sean had accepted a childless life and even though she doubted his commitment to that plan she was in no doubt how she felt. Her life was satisfying; she had no longing for a child. Kate did not want to be pregnant, did not want to be a mother. She had not one inkling of maternal feeling towards this clump of cells growing inside her. Sean wouldn’t understand. He’d think her reaction totally mad. She knew what his response would be to the news.
“Kate, dinner’s ready,” Bree called from the passage.
Kate let out a deep sigh. She’d been feeling a bit off her food for a while. Now she knew there was a reason for it she only felt worse. Laura had muttered something about making pizza tonight. It seemed she was getting fed-up with doing the food too and had said they could get their own tomorrow.
Without their mum they’d lost their cohesion. Dad’s lecture on giving her some space, and they would manage, and pull together as a team in their mother’s absence, had a hollow ring to it, as if he was saying the words but didn’t believe them. Yet again she wondered what was behind her mum’s sudden departure.
The kitchen was full of the smell of crusty dough, melted cheese and cooked tomato. The others were all seated at the table when she arrived and studied her as she took her place.
“Are you all right?” Bree asked. “You look like shit.”