She tied the scarf around her savagely shaved head in such a way that it would not be obvious that she was bald, then wandered around the town centre, asking for work. The city had been half destroyed by Allied bombing raids, so that many shops, businesses and cafes were put out of business. Potential employers were few and far between, but she did not give up. As darkness fell in the late afternoon, she wondered about the farmer who had saved her. Perhaps he would give her some work and shelter. Perhaps she could go back to the hospital and ask the doctor for the farmer’s name and the location of the farm. But then she realised she didn’t know the doctor’s name either.

*

Lilly waited in the cold outside the front entrance of the hospital. She had the coat wrapped tightly around her and she stood in the yellow light of a lamppost. The receptionist had refused to help her and told her she could not wait inside the hospital, so all she could do was stand here outside and hope that the kindly old man would emerge and give her the information that she needed. She would happily do farm work for a little food, shelter and a few francs. Something to tide her over until she could travel into Germany.

The doctor didn’t come but the surly, judgemental nurse appeared. Lilly looked away, not wishing to make eye contact with the woman. The nurse walked on by without a word and then turned back.

‘You know,’ she said, ‘it is not right that you have a German baby and you are alive, while my sister is murdered by the Germans. It is not right. God should not do these things.’

Lilly stiffened and ignored her. Please let the doctor come out.

‘How old is your baby?’ The nurse shook Lilly, demanding she meet her eyes. ‘I ask you again, how old is your baby?’

‘Four weeks, but she is dead.’

‘And you have fed her yourself?’

Lilly nodded, desperate for the woman to leave her alone.

The nurse grabbed her arm. ‘Come with me.’

Lilly tried to wrench her arm away, but she was tired and weak and found herself being manhandled and dragged along the road.

‘Stop, I need to see the doctor.’

‘I tell you what you need, Mademoiselle Marais – you need to do something useful with your worthless life.’

The nurse was strong and brawny and she was not going to release her grip, pulling Lilly around the corner from the hospital, along a bomb-devastated street. Halfway down, she stopped outside a tall house that had escaped the bombing. For a moment, she let Lilly go and turned the handle on the front door. Lilly moved away, but the nurse grabbed her again and pulled her inside the hallway, then pushed her roughly into a large front room.