Not for the want of trying. The police found bolt cutters by the fence, and evidence that they’d been used on at least three dog cages. Fortunately, the intruders weren’t able to make more than a few small holes before the frenzied barking of the dogs woke Sheila and she realised what was going on. Lucky her house is so close. The cages have been mended, she told me, but it’s taking forever to remove the graffiti from the walls. Whoever broke in sprayed “BASTARDS” in at least five or six places, Sheila said.

One of the cages the intruders tried to get into was Jack’s, and I’ve already spoken to the police about the conversation I had with his owners last week, and the weird interview yesterday with Rob Archer, the man who wanted to adopt a Staffordshire bull terrier. I’m convinced one or both of them must have had something to do with the break-in. Sheila also said she saw two people, probably men, in balaclavas, run off and jump into a car then speed away. Everyone assumed that was the car that hit me, but there was no way. According to Sheila, they turned left out of Green Fields and headed towards the lake. I was coming up the hill from the right and, unless they did a loop and were returning to Green Fields, it’s highly unlikely it was they who’d struck me.

I was lying on the grass verge when I came round. I don’t know how long I was unconscious for, but when I opened my eyes – my left eye, at least – it was still dark, my bike was in the bushes and my left arm and shoulder ached when I moved. Sheila and a policeman were standing beside me. They’d heard the impact and the screech of the car’s wheels on the road as it had sped away. Fifteen or twenty minutes later, an ambulance arrived. The paramedic was concerned that I felt nauseous and light-headed, and, according to Sheila, I hadn’t made any sense for the first couple of minutes after I’d come round, so he insisted on taking me to A&E to get checked over. He was also fairly certain I’d dislocated my left shoulder. I was seen very quickly after I arrived at the hospital, and was sedated before a doctor reducted my shoulder and put my arm in a sling. Then I was moved to the observations ward to wait for a CT scan. The results came back clear an hour ago. I just need the doctor to officially discharge me, and I’m free to go home.

“Did you manage to get my phone?”