Soon after the call ends, the doorbell rings. A cluster of anxiety breaks away from my chest and shifts to my stomach. What now? I check my phone. No word from Cain yet. I’d dropped his phone to him at the hospital before I left. When I open the door I find Claire and Axel standing there.

‘My God,’ Claire says. She hugs me, squeezing me so tight my bones click. Axel watches on.

‘Bloody scary,’ he says. ‘You must be shaken up.’ He is much gentler than Claire when he takes me in his arms.

‘Cain texted us,’ he says. ‘Told us what happened but we’d already seen it on the news.’

‘He’s at the hospital still,’ I say. Now that I have the support of my friends, I feel suddenly weaker. Being strong comes much easier when it’s the only option. The sickly feeling of guilt returns and with it heat presses the backs of my eyes.

‘I thought we were going to die,’ I say, tears starting with a helpless sob. ‘I thought we were dead. I wouldn’t have pulled the trigger if I had a choice.’ Axel squeezes me, soothes me with his gentle hands on my back.

‘You poor thing,’ he says. ‘Remember you’re safe now. It’s all over. I’ll pick Cain up tonight, you just rest. He’s tough as nails so he will land on his feet and you’ll be okay too. You did the right thing.’

Easy for others to say.

‘Have you eaten?’ Claire says. ‘You need to eat. I’ll order something.’

‘I’m not hungry,’ I say but when she suggests pizza, I find my appetite responds to the idea. ‘I just feel so guilty. I don’t know why. I know he was a bad man.’

‘It’s normal, Lina,’ Axel says. ‘But it was you and Cain or him. You need to remember that.’

I try to believe it, but I wonder if there was another way.

When the food arrives, Claire goes into the kitchen, finds three plates. The open box reveals a tomato base, melted cheese over salami; it makes my stomach clench. I realise I’ve not eaten a thing today. The other pizza is a margarita.

‘It’s killing me that I got you onto WeStay,’ Axel says, handing me a plate. ‘I feel like shit. I just can’t believe this happened to you.’

‘He’s been beating himself up all morning since we saw the news,’ Claire adds. ‘He’s been trying to think of ways to make it right.’

‘Don’t be ridiculous,’ I say. ‘A very damaged man tried to hurt us and it had nothing to do with you, Axel.’

‘I still feel bad. I hate to see you go through this. I just don’t understand what the hell happened down there.’

‘What do you know?’ I say. ‘What have you heard?’