My back ached. My ankles were swollen. I was so cranky and uncomfortable, I dreaded the thought of a car ride across the city, let alone a five-hour drive across the country. I closed my eyes and imagined how good it would be to see him—to hold him. I’d only seen him a handful of times over the course of the whole pregnancy.

“I’ll be there,” I promised him.

I left the children with Adele and arranged for Lydia and her driver to pick me up. We were on the road before dawn to make the trip to Rügen. From there, we would travel to the island by boat.

“They’ve canceled the pomp and circumstance,” Lydia said with a sigh as we traveled. “I’m so disappointed. I was looking forward to some flair.”

The weather had been dreadful, so the observation towers remained unfinished, and worse, no less than three test launches had failed unexpectedly. This forth test launch would go ahead, but there would be no audience for it beyond me and Lydia.

“I think Otto is only allowing us to visit because morale has been low. And Karl tells me Otto and his superiors have been very pleased with—” she cleared her throat delicately “—well, with Jürgen’s improved attitude in recent times. They wanted to reward him, I think. That’s why they’ve booked us hotel rooms on Rügen for the night, so we don’t have to stay in the dormitory on the island.” She gave me a hopeful smile. “I hope you know, my friend, the future is so bright for you two if you keep on this path.”

When I blinked, I was back in the courtyard with my exhausted husband, staring at his blackened eye. Keep on the path? Taking even a step off meant death.

“Jürgen is devoted to the program,” I said hollowly. “We’re both committed.”

Karl met us at the jetty on the island, and after greeting Lydia with a kiss, he helped me disembark and then led me to a waiting Army vehicle. As a young soldier drove us to the other end of the island, Karl poured us hot tea from a thermos and offered treats procured from a café in Rügen. The car came to a stop on a hill, and Karl opened the door for us. There was little shelter—just a small, three-sided wooden shack.

Farther down the hill a larger building had been erected, along with two half-constructed towers and some half-built stands, clearly intended for a future audience.

“Where is Jürgen?” I asked Karl, as he helped me to a seat in the shack.