“It’s OK, Lizzie,” he said. “I understand. I know it’s too soon. I guess I’ve had time to think about it because Amelia and I were divorcing, but I guess you’d prefer to wait a while before we get together—”

Lizzie threw up her hands. “No,” she said. “Stop.” She looked at him, saw the self-satisfaction on his face, and realised afresh what she already knew. No one had ever turned Dudley Lester down. He simply could not believe it would happen.

“I thought that what we had was different,” she said slowly. “We’re childhood friends, Duds. I think of you like a brother, like you’re my best friend, and that’s special. But it’s not...” She struggled. “It’s not romantic. It was never like that. It was better than that. To change it would spoil everything—” She rubbed a hand across her forehead. “Oh God, I’m doing this all wrong! I know I am. I really like you, Dudley. You’re incredibly important to me. But—”

Dudley’s face had darkened as she was speaking. She knew she was making a terrible mess of everything. She’d never expected to be in this situation with Dudley of all people. She thought they understood each other. She felt disoriented and shocked to have got it so wrong. “This isn’t the time to talk about it,” she said quickly. “It’s late and I’ve got to work tomorrow. I’m doing an orienteering event with kids from St Giles School. I need an early night.”

“Orienteering?” Dudley looked at her, brows arched. “Because you’re, like, really interested in the outdoors?”

“It’s a charity thing for Life Changers,” Lizzie said defensively. “I’m an ambassador for them—”

“Yeah, that figures,” Dudley said. “Because you’re a perpetual child yourself.” He grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair. “I’m going to Mackenzie’s. Perhaps I’ll see you around. If not...” He shrugged.

The door slammed behind him. Shit. Lizzie resisted the urge to call him back or grab a quick change of outfit and head out after him. It was habit, ingrained in her, to look out for him. Even now, when she was reeling at how badly she had misread their relationship, she was still taking responsibility for him.

She scrubbed her hands through her hair in exasperation. She knew exactly what would happen if she did go after him. Dudley would be thrilled to see her, as though their quarrel had never happened. Perhaps he’d interpret it as her changing her mind, succumbing to his irresistible charm. She pulled a face. On the other hand, if she didn’t go, he would get drunk and get himself into deeper trouble, generate more headlines, probably end up in jail.

Lizzie walked through to her bedroom. The flat, so spacious and open in design, suddenly seemed claustrophobic, almost like a prison. She needed to get away. She was gripped by something almost like desperation. She needed to make a break from Dudley and from the life that he represented; the shallow, high-profile celebrity-driven world that she’d inhabited for as long as she could remember. She had no idea where she could go, though, or what she might do. It was a terrifying thought, as though she wanted to throw away the compass of her life and start over—and she wasn’t sure she was brave enough to do that. For a moment she was tempted to reach for the concert programme as she had done that morning, and conjure up memories of her mother to soothe and comfort her, but that felt wrong, as though she were overusing the gift. Instead she lay down on the bed listening to the traffic and the sirens, and thinking about Dudley reporting Johnny to the police for harassment. It must have been directly after that that Johnny had come looking for her. No wonder Arthur had been so protective of his little brother; he must have been afraid she would complain too and that they would take Johnny away.