“I made this deal with myself, that I’d wait with girls until I go away next year to Johns Hopkins. I have to work to keep the grades up, and girls are a distraction. Mostly, I’ll be older, the girls will be older. It ain’t easy, but I can wait.”

“That’s very smart.” Decker stalled. Somehow he got the words out. “Actually, when I asked you if you’d like to tell me something, I was thinking about criminal activity, Jacob.”

Jacob turned red and looked away.

“Am I way off base?” Decker asked.

Jacob continued to stare off. “I shoplifted.”

“B-and-Es?”

“No.” He looked at Decker. “No.”

Decker was about to say, “Okay, I believe you,” but he couldn’t find his voice.

Jacob said, “I shoplifted. Mostly booze, but I also stole about a dozen CDs over about a three-month period.” A pause. “Sixteen CDs. Don’t ask me how I did it with all those metal detectors. There are ways. I’m doing kapparah for it.”

“What kind of atonement?” Decker asked, using the English word.

“I never opened the CDs. They were still in their wrappers.” A beat. “Two months ago Dr. Gruen called the store manager. He explained the situation without mentioning names. Then he returned the CDs for me, no questions asked. As far as the stolen booze goes, I screwed up my nerve and did that myself. I used to hit this mom-and-pop liquor store. The owner—Mr. Kim—he’s being decent about the whole thing. We reached an agreement—a price. I’m working it off—manual labor stuff. Stocking shelves, sweeping, cleaning…watching kids for theft. Now, that is ironic, Alanis Morissette. I do it on Shabbos because it’s the only day I have off. Eema thinks I’m with friends, but I’m not. You can check it out if you want.”

“Where is this place?”

“About four miles from the house. I walk there after lunch. Yossie picks me up after dark. I used to see some of the old crowd there. Now they stay clear of me and of Mr. Kim. I may not have scared Ruby Ranger, but I think I scared lots of them.”

Decker rubbed his head.

“I’ve given you a headache.”

“I’m just glad you told me all this after the fact.”

Jacob said, “I’m doing better, Dad. It’s hard, but I’ll be all right.”

“Yonkie…” Decker cleared his throat. “Am I wrong in assuming that the bastard who molested you did more than you’ve admitted?”

Again the teen turned red. “I told you everything that I remembered. But there may be stuff that…that I blocked out. I was only seven, so…you know.”

Decker felt sick to his stomach. What did that motherfucker do? Calmly, he said, “Are you talking about it with Dr. Gruen?”