He’s pacing, running both hands through his hair. He looks like a caged animal. Finally, he lights up a cigarette and closes his eyes as he inhales. When he opens them, he glances over to me like he knew I’d be standing there, though I don’t think he saw me follow him.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“It’s fine.” He blows out a cloud of smoke and shakes his head. He doesn’t look like he’s going to be sharing his troubles anytime soon so I lean my hip against the railing and we stand like that in our own quiet bubble away from the noise and chaos below. We’ve got a bird’s eye view of the party, but Nathan stares straight ahead into the night. I don’t know what I expected by following him out here, but he looks like he could use a friend.

I’m starting to get cold and wondering how much longer we’re going to stand out here when he says, “I don’t think you’re crazy.”

It takes me a minute to realize he’s referring to our talk earlier. “That makes one of us. I don’t recognize myself anymore. Crazy is probably the nicest way to describe sleeping with you, freaking out, and then conning my roommates into thinking you’re my boyfriend.”

“I think it’s the first time anyone has ever used me to get ahead.” He chuckles. “I kinda liked it. I’m usually the guy girls use to piss off their nice conservative fathers or boyfriends.”

“Well, if I’m ever looking to piss off my dad, I’ll keep you in mind.” He’s smiling and I feel good about that. “Alright. I should get down there and see if I can get my teammates drunk enough that they like me after they find out I made up a boyfriend to win them over. You’re good?”

He nods, and I turn to leave. I’m only a step away when he says my name quietly—rough like sandpaper. “Chloe.”

“Yeah?”

“It was fun being your fake boyfriend. Just be yourself. They’ll come around. And if you ever wanna go out again for real…” He trails off with a shrug.

“Thank you, I’m just not in a place to date for real right now.” He nods in understanding, puts his cigarette out, and we walk back into the house, passing through the bedroom and into the hallway. “And you? Everything going to be okay with you? It was hard not to overhear.”

He lets out a small chuckle. “Little brother.” He shakes his head. “God, he makes me so mad sometimes. The idiot got two speeding tickets in the same fucking week.”

“I didn’t peg you as such a responsible big brother.”

“Yeah, well, when I gotta figure out how to pay for it… it makes me a helluva lot more responsible.”