Instead, I played it cool and averted my gaze as I walked over to sit on my own bed. “Yeah, I’m just trying to keep moving forward,” I said, like I knew what that meant.

“That’s the best way to live, I think,” Jem said.

“If I ask you something, will you give me an honest answer?” I asked, giving him a sidelong glance.

He was slightly taken aback. “I always try to be honest.”

“You really didn’t know who I was?” I asked. “When you met me in Merellä. You didn’t know I was Senka’s daughter or Eliana’s sister?”

“No, I had no idea. I was looking for Ellie, and then I met you.” He raised a shoulder in a nonchalant shrug. “Maybe subconsciously I saw a bit of Senka in you. You don’t look much like her. She looked a lot like Ellie, only taller. But there’s something in you that reminds me of her, an open kindness. There’s a warmth about you that she had.”

I smiled. “So Senka had a kind face?”

“The kindest.” He nodded. “Big, wide, dark brown eyes, and she had a contagious laugh. It was impossible not to feel happy around her. And she was an amazing fighter. She was so fast and light on her feet, and she’d always stop to help anyone that needed it.”

I suddenly remembered a passage from Jem-Kruk and the Adlrivellir.

After they had gathered all the fruit they could carry, they lounged in the meadow. Jem-Kruk smiled at Senka, and it was the smile of a boy who has never been happier and who had never seen a girl prettier.

“She sounds amazing,” I said.

“She really was,” he agreed with a wistful smile.

My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I pulled it out to see a text from Pan asking how things were going. I hadn’t talked to him yet that day, so he was probably getting a little worried.

“Is everything okay?” Jem asked.

“Yeah. Pan’s just checking in with me.”

“Is he your boyfriend?” he asked, surprising me.

“Yeah. Sorta. I think.”

“Like veloma?” Jem asked, using the álfar word that meant “the one you choose to be with.”

“Yeah.” I smiled. “Pan is my veloma.”

“Good,” he said with an unreadable smile of his own. “I’m glad you have someone who cares for you so much.” And then he gestured broadly around. “You have so many that care about you. Senka would be so happy. All she ever would’ve wanted for you is a life full of love.”

I swallowed hard, barely holding back the tears, and I managed to eke out, “Thank you. I needed to hear that.”

“It’s good that I stopped by then.”

I wiped my eyes hurriedly and looked over at him. “I’m sorry. I’ve just been talking. You found out your brother is alive!”