I felt a jolt of recognition. This was one of the childhood memories Bram subjected me to in the cellar. Another strip of his past, snaking around mine.

“She checked closets and stove knobs constantly, until we were so late we had to skip whatever we had planned and stay locked in the house. She would wake up in the night screaming her head off about intruders, but there was never anyone there. It was all in her head, but it was real to her, and that made it real to us. I was so afraid I’d become like her. That’s why I started using,” she said, and for a split second my stubborn and cynical cousin let her mask slip, exposing the frailty underneath. “It was a way to escape her, the only way I could think of at the time.”

“Why didn’t she take medication to manage it?” I asked, remembering that Abe had called her a hypocrite for suggesting he do the same. If Felicia’s mental state was yo-yoing more than usual, I couldn’t imagine my mother choosing not to intervene. Surely she insisted Felicia get help? But then I remembered the conversation I’d had with my parents, and Mom’s impression that Abe’s bruise was the result of a fall. When it came to her sister, Felicia was good at downplaying her disease.

“She didn’t like the way the pills made her feel,” Crissy said. “Sometimes she’d take them, sometimes not. By the time I was fifteen, she was off them completely, and refused to go back on. You wouldn’t know that,” she said, sounding sullen. “Not even Della did.”

She paused to pinch the bridge of her nose. Tim gave her a nod of encouragement, and she continued.

“Abe never talked about it. He thought if your parents found out how bad things were for us, they wouldn’t let him spend time with you anymore. He said if he couldn’t see you, he’d die. So I didn’t tell Della, either.”

I tried to swallow, and realized I’d been holding my breath.

“It was hard on him,” Crissy said. “He was always on edge. When she had one of her episodes, Abe would cry for hours. The littlest thing would set her off, and then it would happen all over again.”

In all the years I’d known Crissy, I’d never seen her give a damn about her brother. Or was it that I’d convinced myself she didn’t care? I was starting to wonder just how badly I’d misjudged my cousin.

“So you didn’t tell your aunt,” Tim said. “Did you talk to anyone else? Shana’s dad? A teacher? Your father?”

Crissy gave a small nod. “Just before the end of the school year, I told Brett. I couldn’t stand the thought of being alone with her all summer, and I was worried about Abe. Brett confronted her about it. I’m sure the whole block heard the yelling. Felicia wouldn’t go back on her medication, and he couldn’t change her mind.”