As she stood there, atop the MacKeltar’s mountain in the falling twilight, Chloe was suddenly back in Kansas again, in the silent cemetery, after all their friends had gone, weeping at the foot of his grave. Uncertain, poised on the brink of adulthood, with no one to help her make decisions and choose her way. She’d suffered the comforting delusion that he would live forever, not die at a mere seventy-three from a stroke. She’d gone away to college, never imagining that he wouldn’t always be there, at home, puttering around his garden, waiting for her.

The phone call came during finals week her sophomore year. She’d just talked to him on the phone a few days before. One day he was there, the next day he was gone. She hadn’t even gotten to say good-bye. Same as her parents. Couldn’t anyone die a slow death from some disease, she’d felt like wailing (painlessly, of course, she’d not wish a painful death on anyone), and give her a damned sense of closure? Did they have to just go away? One moment, smiling and alive, the next, still and silent and forever lost. There were so many things she hadn’t gotten to say to him before he left. He’d seemed so fragile in his coffin; her robust, temperamental Scot, who’d always seemed invincible to her.

Was that when she’d begun playing things safe? Because she’d felt like a turtle without a shell, fragile and exposed, unwilling to love and lose again? Oh, she’d not decided such a thing consciously, but she’d gone back to college and buried herself in a double major, then a master’s. Without even thinking, she’d kept herself too busy to get involved.

She blinked. The grief was still raw, as if she’d never faced it, only pushed it into a dark corner, blocking it. It occurred to her that maybe a person couldn’t shut out one emotion, such as grief, without losing touch with all of them. By shutting out pain, refusing to face it, had she missed innumerable chances to love?

Chloe glanced at Gwen searchingly. “It sounds like you’re encouraging me.”

“I am. He’s going to ask something of you. The mere fact that he’s going to ask it speaks more than any words could, of how he feels about you.”

“What is he going to ask me?”