She glanced across to the main bar, seeking out Rebecca, the bar manager. She couldn’t help but stare at her, safe in the knowledge that Rebecca was unawares. God, she looked fucking gorgeous tonight—tight leather trousers, with a white shirt over a black vest top. Her hair was pinned up on one side, leaving a cascade of soft brown curls to waterfall down her left shoulder. Oh, how she longed to bury her face in that neck and her hands in that hair.

She shook herself and tore her gaze away. Stupid. Rebecca was off limits. She was very happily straight, engaged, and she was Mandy’s best friend. Leave it.

But God, it was so hard not to fantasize, and Mandy wondered for the umpteenth time how she’d ended up in this predicament. She, of the no-strings, nothing’s-going-to-tie-me-down lifelong attitude was madly, crazily, heartbreakingly in love for the first time in her life, at the age of forty-two and with a woman she couldn’t have. Life was fucking cruel sometimes.

They’d met eighteen months ago at the previous club Mandy had managed for Robbie. Smaller than this one, but he’d wanted to test her before letting her run one of his jewels, as he called them. Rebecca had been bar manager there too, and they’d quickly become friends, sharing the same sick sense of humour and love of fashion. And when Robbie had promoted Mandy to run this new club, it had been a no-brainer to bring Rebecca along to manage the bars.

It had taken Mandy only a couple of months to fall head-over-heels in love with her new friend. At first, she had found it amusing, and then it became increasingly intolerable as she realised just how deep her feelings ran. She should have put some distance between them, but she just couldn’t do it. Being with Rebecca brought so much joy into her life; she couldn’t deprive herself of it. So she’d learned to suppress her yearnings and make do with the wonderfully satisfying friendship that Rebecca offered.

She needed to find an outlet for her deeper desires in other places, with other women—faceless, nameless women—as she had done for years now.

True, it had been hard when Rebecca got engaged. Her boyfriend had proposed about a month ago. Seeing Rebecca so excited about being engaged, and being asked to help plan a big wedding, was painful. As was wishing it was she who would be walking down the aisle with Rebecca.