Dedication

To all the good girls who turned bad.

Playlist

"Baby you want it, yeah

Slow it down if you need to

Show me how just to please you

Work it out in the sheets

Do me and see through

I want you feel you"

Shut Up and Listen

- Nicholas Bonnin & Angelicca

I Was Never There THE WEEKND

Bound 2 KANYE

Hymn for the Weekend COLDPLAY

Fuck Love TRIPPIE REDD

Undercover SELENA GOMEZ

Sex With Me RIHANNA

Earned It THE WEEKEND

Die For You THE WEEKEND

Feel A Way H.E.R.

Habits Of My Heart JAYMES YOUNG

This Could Be Us RAE SREMMURD

Don't Wanna Fall In Love KYLE

Close NICK JONAS

Hands To Myself SELENA GOMEZ

Dangerous Woman ARIANA GRANDE

Be Together MAJOR LAZER

Often THE WEEKND

I Wanna Be Yours ARCTIC MONKEYS

Dirty TANK

Acquainted THE WEEKEND

Love Me Now JOHN LEGEND

Selfish Love DJ SNAKE

Fall In Love $NOT

Young Dumb & Broke KHALID

Heartless MADISON BEER

Smells Like Teen Spirit NIRVANA

Prologue

FIFTEEN YEARS AGO

"Surprise!" my parents and Alexander’s say as they smile at us with open arms.

A smile falls on my lips as I take in what's behind them and around Alexander and me.

A farm.

Mommy and daddy got me a farm.

I run to mommy and wrap my arms around her. "Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love it so much." Mommy hugs me back and I can feel her smile as she puts her cheek against mine.

I let go of her and go to hug daddy. "I hope you like it, la mia principessa," he whispers in my ear before kissing my forehead.

I let go of him and smile so hard my teeth almost fall out. "I love it so much. Alexander and I are going to have so much fun," I say before looking at Alexander who has a small smile that threatens to fall on his lips.

I know he is happy.

He is just a boy and boys don't like to smile.

I asked mommy one time why boys don't like smiling and she just told me that boys are stupid.

Alexander isn't stupid though.

He's so smart and cool.

I wish I could be as cool as him.

Alexander is my best friend, other than Jane but she doesn't even talk that much yet but I know we will be best friends too.

"Alexander! Let's go play!" I say as I run towards him and wrap my arms around his stomach.

"Yeah, kids. Go play. Check out all of the animals," Emma, Alexander's mom says as she smiles down at us.

I let go of Alexander and jump up and down before running towards where the horses are.

Horses are my favorite animal.

They are so pretty.

"What's your favorite animal, Alexander?” I look at him and he looks away from the horses to look down at me.

At six years old, Alexander is tall.

He is almost as tall as the big kids in our school.

But it's a good thing he is tall because then he can beat people up who are mean to me.

Last week Kevin, a mean kid who is in Alexander's grade, pushed me off the swing. Before I could even say something to him and push him back, Alexander pushed him to the ground and slapped him on the face.

I like seeing him fight. I smiled when I saw Alexander do that for me.

That's why he is my favorite person in the world. I love mommy and daddy, but I also love Alexander.

Sometimes he is mean, but he always says sorry when he is mean.

"I like whatever you like," he says and I feel myself smile again.

"Let's ride one of the horses, Alexander!" I say before running towards the stables.

Alexander follows me, running almost as fast as me. I laugh as we race to see who can get to the stables first.

"Beat ya!" Alexander yells once he touches the stables that hold a horse.

I rest my hands on my knees, trying to catch my breath. "Not . . . fair." Alexander breathes in and out as he smiles at me. By the time we are done catching our breaths, we both start walking down to the barn to look at the horses. I see a pretty black one which makes me smile again and walk closer to it. "Look at this one, Alexander. He is so pretty." I look at Alexander and see him looking at me with a smile on his face.

I smile back at him and look up at the horse. I reach out to touch his head that is hanging out of the stable but instead I touch his nose, a hand grabs mine and turns me around to make me face a man with a dark skin tone and white hair on his face.

"Don't be touching things that will hurt you, little bit," he says and I feel my heart race as I try to get my hand out of his grip.

"Hey, let go of her," Alexander says as he grabs my hand and takes my wrist out of the man's hold.

The man stands straight, and he looks like a giant as he towers over us.

The man was about to say something but then I hear daddy yell my name making me turn my head and see him at the entrance of the stables.

"Daddy!" I yell as I run towards him. "He tried to take me away. Say ‘saluta da parte mia satana’ to him and make him light up!"

Daddy starts laughing and shakes his head as he kneels, so he is the same height as me. "Baby, he isn't trying to hurt you. He is just making sure you won't get hurt with the horses. They can be dangerous la mia principessa," daddy says as he moves the hair out of my face. He then looks up at the man behind us. "Did something happen?"

"Thalia tried to touch Nyx. He is the new horse I told you about. The one that has issues."

My dad nods his head and looks back at me. "The horse you were about to touch is dangerous. It's good you didn't touch him."

"But I want to ride one."

"Okay. You can ride one. Just one that fits your size, Thalia," daddy stands up and grabs my hand and Alexander's, who is next to me. "Let's go find a good horse for you guys to ride and then you can explore the rest of the land, okay?"

Alexander ended up getting a white horse and I asked daddy if I could get a black one so he gave me a black one.

I wanted to ride the bigger black ones, but daddy said it was too dangerous.

As Alexander and I ride the horse, mommy holds my hand while taking pictures. Daddy and Alexander's dad, Leo, are walking behind us while Emma and mommy are next to us. I wanted mommy to ride with me, but daddy said she couldn't because she was holding my baby brother in her stomach.

Alexander wants to go faster on the horse but the guy from the stables, whose name is Luca, told him to not go fast since this was his first time riding the horse.

After Alexander and I are done riding the horses, mommy and daddy tell us to go look around the farm some more.

When Alexander and I walk past the chicken pen, I start walking a little faster than him because I hate chickens. He laughs but doesn’t tease me. Instead, he makes us go the opposite way so I won’t be scared.

That's one of the things I love most about him, he always looks out for me and makes sure I am okay.

Now, Alexander and I are sitting on the grass where there are small flowers around us.

"What do you want to do when you are bigger? Like as an adult like our moms and dads?" I ask Alexander and he looks at me as he picks the grass.

He shrugs his shoulders, "I don't know. I kind of like what they do."

"How they make people turn red?" Alexander laughs and nods his head. "It's so weird that we are getting older. You're already six!"

"I'm happy we share a birthday," Alexander says and I see him pick a flower from the grass. He turns his head to look at me and he extends his hand to mine and offers me the flower. "Happy birthday Thalia. I love you."

I smile and my face feels like it's on fire. "Thank you, thank you, thank you," I take the flower from him and wrap my arms around his head to hug him. "I love you too, Alexander."

Alexander and I hug for what feels like forever but then I hear daddy calling my name making me release Alexander and stand up. I see daddy who is waving at me from down the small hill that Alexander and I are sitting on.

I look at Alexander. "I have to go. Are you coming?"

"I will go in a little bit," Alexander says and he smiles at me.

"Okay. I'll see you later," I give him one last smile before running down the hill.

I look at the flower Alexander gave me and look back down at my dad as I put the flower in my back pocket.

I'll keep it forever.

One

SIX YEARS AGO

"God, he is hot. I wish he could take my virginity," Becca says as she rolls her eyes to the back of her head.

I almost gag just from hearing her talk about him.

"No, same. I once heard that he beat up one of the senior Calcio players. No one goes after those dudes," Regina agrees and I can almost hear her moan from just sitting next to her.

"You guys are both disgusting for wanting someone like him. Trust me he isn't all that."

Regina looks away from him and looks at me with a raised eyebrow, "Aren't you guys like cousins?"

I cringe when she says that. "No, we're not fucking cousins you dumbass. His father is my father's best friend."

"Lucky. So, you get to fuck him."

I can't help but laugh.

Yea.

Like Alexander and I will ever be fucking one another.

"Why would you even suggest that? That's stupid, I have no clue where you get these ideas, Regina. I will never be fucking Alexander. I have better things to do than obsess over him like you and the rest of these stupid little girls at this school do. I'm better than that."

"You guys would kind of look good together not going to lie," Becca says and I just roll my eyes at her for the fifth time today.

I look away from the food on my plate and look at Alexander who is sitting at the opposite table across the room. I feel my body fill with heat. My hands clench by my side and I can't help but feel my heart rate speed up.

Fuck you, Xander Russo.

Alexander smirks at me and then winks.

I bite the inside of my cheek and try to ignore the churn in my stomach.

God, I feel like I'm going to throw up.

Alexander Russo.

So many ways to describe the type of person he is.

He is worse than the nightmares under my bed. He isn't a good guy like the other guys at this school.

No.

Alexander Russo is a jackass and if my dad wasn't named the number one devil in the world, Alexander would take that spot.

He is only sixteen, but he has done so much damage that it would probably scare all of these little girls away.

I've seen everything he has done.

Sometimes I find myself wanting to be that deranged in the way he is.

My father and his father are business partners but not in the way you think. Everyone at this school thinks my dad is just some rich CEO who owns billion dollar companies but it's actually the complete opposite. Now don't get me wrong, he does own companies but not the kind you think.

Alexander's father is second in command for my father so that means that we have to spend a lot of time together. It doesn't help that my mom and his mom are best friends.

My father and mother even bought a fucking farm for him and me when we were five years old. That's where my hate for him grew.

He would always chase me around with chickens, which are my least favorite animals in the world. Every time we went to that farm, he would chase me around with them and I would always end up crying.

After that, he would show me that he hates me in other ways such as teasing me for my choice of clothing when I was a toddler and didn't have the best style, or how girls aren't as good as guys, or even drawing on my face or cutting some of my hair whenever I was asleep.

But before he started being a jackass towards me, he was actually sweet.

One of my earliest memories of Alexander and I was when he gave me a pretty flower and said that he loved me with a beautiful smile on his face. I remember how red my cheeks were that day.

But after that it's always been him teasing me, bullying me in any way he can, corrupting me even.

"Are you even listening to what I am saying?" Becca asks me with her eyebrow raised, acting like a bitch as usual.

"No Becca, please tell me what you were saying so I can pretend that I actually give a fuck," I say giving her a fake smile.

I have no clue why I am hanging out with these bimbos but sometimes they entertain me. Today, they are just being annoying which makes me want to punch them in the face.

Becca laughs and shakes her head. "You and your attitude, Thalia," she looks at me. "I was asking you about Cameron. I saw him talk to you today."

I try not to blush as I think about Cameron.

He is this guy in my history class. Today we had to work together on this study guide the teacher gave us and he gave me his number so that we could talk later about the study guide.

Cameron is cute and sweet. He always gives me such a nice and warm smile and I swear he looks like one of the gods from above.

He just moved here a couple of months ago and since then I have had my eyes on him.

I told Jane about him, my best friend who also happens to be my cousin, and she said that I should go for it, even though she doesn't even understand high school guys.

"Nothing. Cameron just gave me his-"

I feel cold liquid being poured on my head as I talk, and I can't help but scream and clench my hands into fists. I look down at my shirt and see that it is soaked with milk.

Fucking jackass.

I turn around and look up at him.

He just has this small smirk on his face as he looks down at me with mischief in his eyes.

I stand up and face him, trying to make myself look taller in front of him but it's no use.

He is the tallest guy in his grade, and I still haven't grown much from my 5'6 height.

"Fucking Xander!" I yell and put my finger on his chest. "What the hell is wrong with you? You're fucking sick!"

"I thought you knew how sick I was, Thalia," he smiles down at me, but I can't help but feel rage spread throughout my body.

"There is seriously something wrong with you."

I push him out of the way and walk past him leaving through the doors of the cafeteria.

I'm so going to get him back.

Fuck him. 

Fuck his stupid smirk. 

Fuck his stupid tall body. 

Fuck his beautiful fucking face. 

And fuck Alexander Russo.

When I am in the parking lot of the school I go to my car and unlock the door.

Technically I am not supposed to be driving but who gives a shit? My dad controls the police in the whole country, so I get to do whatever I want, plus my house is right down the street.

I see a sweater in the back, so I grab it and smell it to see if it's clean; it is.

I put it down and then lift the baseball t-shirt I'm wearing over my head and then throw it in the car.

I turn around and face my car door.

As I am about to take off my undershirt, I feel a pair of hands grab my breasts making my blood freeze and turn around.

I see an old guy with a long gray beard and wrinkles on his face.

He has to be sixty or something.

And on drugs.

I slap his face and push him away from me.

"Get the fuck off of me you weirdo," I say and I’m about to turn around, but he turns me around and pushes me against the car. "Let me fucking go," I say as I try to push him away from me.

He still holds a tight grip on one of my arms. With my other arm, I reach into my back pocket and get my hand knife. I flip it in my hand before stabbing the blade into his neck making him immediately release me and scream in pain.

I grab the knife out of his neck and push him to the floor. I stand above him and dig the knife into his chest and drag it down his body as his screams fill the air.

Thank god my car is covering us from the school cameras and I parked far too.

I take my knife out of his body and look down at him.

Fucking dickhead.

I hear slow claps from behind me which makes me turn around and see Alexander walking towards me slowly with a smirk on his face as he claps.

"Never been more impressed, angel."

Two

PRESENT

I hear my alarm go off, making me open my eyes and roll to my side to turn the alarm off.

I look at the clock from over my TV that is mounted to the wall.

6:30 am

Holy shit.

I close my eyes for another second before taking the covers off of my body and getting out of bed. I walk inside the bathroom and look in the mirror to see how horrible I look. My long dark hair is a mess and it looks like a bird's nest. Don’t even get me started on the smudged mascara around my eyes.

Last night I went out on a mission to kill this one guy who was sending threats to my father, so my mom asked me to go and kill him.

It was a long night. I got in super late.

He didn't trust easily so I had to seduce him and then bring him into one of the hotels nearby to kill him. Since I had nobody with me, I had to get rid of the body myself and ship it off to his Mafia.

I didn't care where he was from, only if I got the job done and I did.

I did have to kiss him in some places I didn't want to, but you have to do what you have to do. At least he was attractive, but I don't let looks get to me.

I wash my face before getting out of the restroom and walking inside my closet to pick out my clothes for the gym.

The reason I have to wake up so early every day is that I have training in the mornings and my brother has school. My mother wants Killian to go to high school and experience that kind of thing like I did. In high school I usually stuck to myself because I never really liked to engage in all of the social events that the students held at the school. They were stupid. I had a few friends in freshman year and later on I became one of the most popular girls at my school.

Girls hated me because their boyfriends liked me better. I can’t help it that I’m a flirt. It’s literally my job to do that.

One of my friends, Becca, stopped being friends with me because I slept with her boyfriend. I thought they broke up and he was attractive, so I didn’t say no. When she found out, she was furious and stopped talking to me.

I learned that she went to college to be a doctor while I stayed here to become the first-ever female mafia boss. To be more specific, the Italian Mafia Donna.

From my knowledge and my father's, there has never been a female heir to a mafia group since ever and lucky me, I’ll be the first. My father and I argued about it, and he said he wanted Killian to take over his role since he is getting older, and he is a boy, but I reasoned with him and he eventually gave in.

He still treats me as his la mia principessa.

I change into a pair of leggings and a white sports bra. After I put my shoes on, I leave my room.

As I walk through the hallway, I see all of the pictures of me and my brother as toddlers and then pictures of me and Jane. I also see my mom and father's wedding pictures which always make me smile because whenever I look at them together, I actually believe that love is real and not just something that happens in stories or movies.

I walk inside the kitchen and see my brother, Killian, and my mother, cooking.

"The monster’s awake," Killian mutters as he eats his breakfast that my mother made.

My brother Killian is fifteen, about to turn sixteen, soon. I thought over the years our relationship would get better, and we would stop arguing but that definitely isn't the case. If anything, he is more annoying than ever.

And when he brings his friends over, he sometimes acts like a jackass towards me. His friends are assholes though and always try to hit on me but Killian always makes sure to punch them in the face if they try to make a move but he sometimes forgets I know how to handle myself and that I basically kill people for a living.

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