JANE [impatiently]: The North Woods! Put that thing down!

MOONY: Okay. [Obeys.]

JANE: Here. Drink yer milk. You act like a crazy man, honest to Jesus you do!

MOONY: Okay. Would that give the Dutchman a laugh!

JANE: What would? You better be careful.

MOONY: He’ll go all over the plant—tell the boys what Moony said this morning—said he’d seen the stars las’ night but not like they was in Ontario when he was choppin’ down the big timber.

JANE: Yes, you’ll give him a swell impression with talk of that kind. I’m dog-tired. [Pours herself some of the steaming milk.]

MOONY: Ever seen the St. Lawrence River?

JANE: Naw, I’ve seen wet diapers, that’s all, for so long that—!

MOONY: That’s what I’ll ask the Dutchman. I’ll ask him if he’s ever seen the St. Lawrence River.

JANE [glancing at him suspiciously]: What would you ask him that for?

MOONY: She’s big. See? She’s nearly as big and blue as the sky is, an’ the way she flows is straight north. You ever heard of that, Jane? A river that flowed straight north?

JANE [indifferently, as she sips her hot milk]: No.

MOONY: Only river I ever known of that flowed north!

JANE: Emma says a drop of paregoric would keep his bowels from runnin’ off like that. I think I’ll try it next time.

MOONY: We was talkin’ about it one day an’ Spook says it’s because the earth is curved down that way toward the Arctic Circle! [Grins.]

JANE: What?

MOONY: He said that’s why she flows north—

JANE: Who cares?

MOONY: Naw, the Dutchman don’t, neither. That’s why I tell him. Makes it funny, see? I’ll tell him she’s big, damn big, an’ they call her the Lake of a Thousand Islands!

JANE: He’ll say you’re crazy. He’ll tell you to go an’ jump in it!

MOONY: Sure he will. That’s what makes it funny. I’ll tell him she’s big an’ blue as the sky is, with firs an’ pines an’ tamaracks on both sides of her fillin’ the whole God-beautiful air with—the smell of—Hot milk, huh? Wouldn’t that give the Dutchman a laugh!—Hot milk at four o’clock in the morning!—He’d go all over the plant an’ tell the boys that Moony must have his liddle hot milk at night when he goes bye-bye with the Sandman.

JANE: Louise Krause’s husband commenced sayin’ such things an’ they called out the ambulance squad. Right now he’s in a straitjacket in the psychopathic ward an’ when Louise went up to see him he didn’t remember who she was even! Demen-shuh pre-cox they called it! [Moony seizes cup and dashes milk to floor.] Moony!— What d’yuh think yuh’re doin’, yuh big lug? Sloppin’ good milk on the floor!

MOONY: Hot milk, huh?

JANE: Oh, dear Christ! You an’ your kid, what a mess you both are! No wonder they all make fun of you down at the plant. The way that you act there’s only one word for it—crazy! [Moony snorts indignantly.] Yes, crazy! Crazy is the only word for your actions!