“She would love this,” I said. “Remember how she used to get hypnotized by fire? I’ll make another for her tomorrow night.”

“She’ll like that.”

I sat back away from the popping wood. “When did life become such bone ache?” I asked.

“Remember your idea for a furniture store?” Meg asked.

“What’s that?”

“You said you wanted to open a store that sold only footstools and call it the Ottoman Empire. That was on our first date.”

“And here we are,” I said.

“Here we are.” Meg cleared her throat, a nervous tic. “I keep waiting to wake up. This has to be a bad dream.”

I pushed a log and got the fire to flame up.

“What are we going to do?”

“We have to be strong for Sarah. What else can we do? We can’t let her be terrified. I couldn’t take that.”

“Yes.”

“You know, we’re going to lose her before we lose her.” I hated the way that sounded, almost flippant, but I didn’t mean it to be, of course.

Meg cried. I did too. But I didn’t pull myself up to sit next to her and hold her. We stared at the fire and wept.

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Qf5 Rdh8

I didn’t follow Meg to bed that night. Instead I grabbed a flashlight and took a short hike up the trail. The scariest part of walking at night was before I was on the trail, fearing that I might be spotted by a cop. Still, I practiced no stealth whatsoever but instead shined my light wildly and let my boots fall heavily. Lions are nocturnal, and I wanted my presence known. I felt some relief when I found the path. I didn’t want to go far up the mountain, just far enough that I felt I was in the wild, alone.

I sat on a big rock and switched off my light. It was not a wise move, but I felt compelled to do it. I was in the deep dark. The sky was clear. I stared up at the sea of stars and listened to the arroyo in front of me. I imagined that I might hear the padded steps of a cougar, but that was unlikely. It was feasible that I would hear a bear popping brush. As a stinky human, I had little chance of experiencing either.

A familiar sweet smell found me. It was marijuana. Someone was in these woods getting high. I didn’t mind that they were high. I did mind that they were there. I made my way back down the trail, my light off this time.

Sarah and I sat down to complete our game. I felt little hope for myself. I loved the bloodthirsty look in her eyes.

“You are a mean person.”

“I know.”

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Re6

“Ah,” she said and made her move. Rxh2