I wake up at four in the morning, like always. I stand out on the deck of the double-wide with a coffee and a cigarette. I am amazed that I am still here after last night’s campfire story. I remind myself that I’m leaving the day after tomorrow. I find comfort in that. I’ll set the story straight with my boys on the way home. Now is not the time to reopen old wounds. Besides, Sister has her new man coming along today to look at us all. I wonder what she has told him. I only know that he is a millionaire. I only know that he is white and from the city. He will be her human shield.

Sister wakes up and joins me on the deck. Like she has always done, she scolds me for smoking. I laugh at this and tell her that reformed smokers are the worst. She reminds me that cigarettes killed our father. All I can do is sigh and say, “I still miss him.”

The hardness that has always been a part of Sister appears. “Well, you’d think you’d learn something from it!” she exclaims. I grin and wonder if Sister ever learned anything from our parents. All Sister ever did was turn away from them and all the rest of us. In her mind, she was never really one of us.

We agree to cook breakfast together and as the bacon sizzles, my sons wake up and come into the big kitchen. Tom pours a coffee and announces he’s going to the deck for a smoke. Sister growls and says, “Fine!” Tom nods and smiles, closes the deck doors behind him. Lance stumbles in. He says good morning, but I am the only one who replies. I am amazed at the steel door that her mind can be. The hardness that lies there, the determination that she is always right. I give Lance a morning kiss and tell him that I’m happy he’s here.

After breakfast, Sister takes us to meet the horses that work this camp. There are riders coming out for the day and the horses must be readied. This isn’t her job. Her job is in town, but she dives in and starts grooming the horses one by one while giving us each orders to shovel up horse poop, to put bridles onto fence posts, to get some oats or chop into bags to be slung around the horses’ necks.

None of us move. We have no idea what we are to do. Instead, we stand around like statues, watching her. Control is a big part of her life. She needs to have everyone doing things on her command. She should have been in the military. She would have done well. Instead, she’s a nurse who has run away from her son in the city and lives where there is no cellphone service. She’s gone into hiding.