At first I didn’t think I’d heard her right, because they had the sound system turned up so loud, with Rihanna’s “Pon De Replay” blaring. Then I noticed her expression, which was a mixture of dismay and total embarrassment. And I realized what she’d said.

My God. She’d drunk the fat. LILLY DRANK THE FAT!!!!

Even Ross didn’t drink the fat when Rachel asked him to. He was GOING to, but at the last minute, she stopped him….

Only I hadn’t gotten a chance to stop Lilly from drinking the fat. Because I had never in a million years thought she’d go ahead and do it. I mean, we’re best friends, and all.

But that she’d actually gone ahead and DRUNK THE FAT??? I couldn’t believe it.

“You TOLD him?” I practically shrieked.

“Shhhh!” Lilly pinched me. A birthday pinch to grow an inch, I guess. “Not so loud! Yes, I told him. That’s what you wanted, wasn’t it? That’s what you said I had to do so you could trust me again. So I did it.”

And then I felt the mean little elf that had sprung alive inside me the day before die a quick, ignominious death. What had I been thinking? Why had I asked Lilly to do something so stupid—and humiliating? Telling J. P. she loved him wasn’t going to keep her from cheating on him with some other random guy, as she’d done to Boris, or keep her from mortifying me at this, or any other future event. I can’t believe I’d asked her to do something so stupid…so practically guaranteed to make him run from her like a startled fawn.

But even more, I couldn’t believe she’d actually done it.

Glancing over to where J. P.—who was turning out not to be the world’s best skater—was being coaxed by Lars to let go of the rink wall, I asked, “What did he say? When you told him, I mean?”

“Thank you,” Lilly said softly.

“You’re welcome,” I said. “I knew if you were just honest with him about your feelings, it would all work out.” I’d actually known no such thing, but it seemed like the right thing to say. “But what did he say?”

“That’s just it,” Lilly said, still not looking very happy. “He said Thank you.”

I blinked at her. “Wait…you told J. P. you love him, and all he said back was Thank you?”

Lilly nodded. She still looked…funny. Like she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

And honestly, I didn’t know which she should do either.

“Not exactly an explosion of passion, huh?” Lilly said.

“Not exactly,” I said. What could J. P. be thinking? Who says Thank you to someone who says they love you? Especially to someone whose tongue has been in your mouth?

Then, because the whole thing was my fault, really, I said, “But it could be, you know, that he didn’t know how to reply. I mean, on account of him not being used to having a girlfriend. Or any sort of human interaction, aside from his parents.”