And I started to leave.

BECAUSE I KNEW IT!!!! I KNEW MY GRANDMOTHER HAD BEEN UP TO SOMETHING!!!!!

But I didn’t get very far, on account of tripping over a power cord for one of the lights they’d set up.

Also on account of Grandmère standing up (dislodging a very surprised Rommel, who fortunately, due to years of practice, was able to land on his feet) and saying, “Amelia! Sit down this instant!”

It’s her voice. There’s just something about that voice that MAKES you do what she says. I don’t know how she does it, but she does.

I found myself sinking down onto the couch, nursing the shin I’d bonked against her coffee table.

“That’s better,” Grandmère said in a totally different tone. She sank back down into her fancy pink chair. “Now, let’s try that again. Amelia, these nice people are going to televise your sweet sixteen birthday party on a special edition of their reality series. This will generate a great deal of publicity for the country of Genovia, over which you will one day rule, and which is currently suffering from an almost total lack of American tourists, thanks to the weak dollar and your father’s recent decision to limit the number of cruise ships that may dock there to twelve per week. Now, please allow Janine to put a microphone on you so that we can begin. I don’t want to keep my dinner date waiting. Mr. Castro is a very impatient man.”

I took a deep breath. Then I went—even though I really, really didn’t want to know—“What sweet sixteen birthday party?”

“The one I am throwing for you,” Grandmère said. “I shall be flying you and one hundred of your closest friends in the royal jet to Genovia, where you’ll be met at the airport by horse-drawn carriages and taken immediately to the palace for a champagne brunch, followed by an all-expenses-paid shopping trip to boutiques such as Chanel and Louis Vuitton on the Rue de Prince Phillipe for the girls, and a trip to the Genovian beach for private jet ski lessons for the boys. Then it’s back to the palace for massages and fashion and beauty makeovers. Then everyone is invited to a black-tie ball in your honor, at which Destiny’s Child, who have agreed to reunite for one night only on your behalf, will perform their greatest hits. After which I will have everyone flown home the following morning so that they arrive back in America in time for school on Monday.”

I could only stare at her. I knew my mouth was open. I also knew that Rafe was filming the whole thing.

But I couldn’t close my mouth. And I couldn’t summon the words to ask Rafe to put his camera down.

Because I was totally FREAKED!!!!

Champagne brunches? All-expenses-paid shopping trips to Louis Vuitton? Massages? Destiny’s Child? One hundred of my closest friends?

I don’t even KNOW one hundred people, much less have that many friends.