Chapters (39)
- Cover
- Title Page
- Dedication
- Bitch
- Freed from Desire
- Horizons
- Taking Stock
- The Branches of the Paulownia
- Swimming Pools
- Small Town
- The Watershed
- Moby Dick
- The Way of the Cross
- Family
- Boredom
- Coffee in an Algerian-Style Mug
- The Path of the Drip
- Edward Bond
- Never Be Like Them
- The Wretched of the Earth
- Anything or Anybody
- Corso Fleuri
- Friends for Life
- The Banks of the Durance
- Preparations
- The Foreman
- The Long Night
- The Decorative Pond
- Even in Our Own Backyard
- Old Things
- One Day, on La Rambla
- Summer Rain
- Love Me Lili
- Blood on the Sheets
- Like the Song
- The Summer She Was Fifteen
- Blaze
- Almost Attractive (Epilogue)
- Acknowledgements
The kid has dry snot stuck to his cheek. Séverine crouches to wipe his face. In the village school where she works, Séverine doesn’t just serve meals with a paper cap on her head. She also looks after the kids during playtime while the teachers are smoking their cigarettes in the parking area, and helps out during classes: she puts away the games, blows snotty noses, dabs scraped knees with red cotton wool and counts to make sure all the round-edged scissors are there. She hands the children to their parents after school. She doesn’t mind. It’s a job. Badly paid and exhausting, but so vital that she can’t see how they could dispense with her. Naturally, she sometimes dreams of something else. But she doesn’t know what.
She doesn’t stop in the summer. The outdoor centre replaces school but it’s the same kids, the same company that provides the meals, and playtime is longer.
She pushes the kid towards his mother, who quickly shoves a bun in his mouth. Séverine knows the boy’s mother, of course, she’s the younger sister of a high-school friend; except for American retirees and holidaying Parisians, she knows everybody here, and that’s the problem.
“I heard about your daughter.”
Séverine makes a U-turn, her face not very friendly, but the other woman isn’t discouraged.
“If you need anything at all —”
“Like what?”
The mother’s smile freezes and turns into an embarrassed laugh. “I don’t know.”
“If you don’t know, why are you talking?”
The young woman pulls her kid towards her like a shield. She suddenly has a fleeting but clear picture of Séverine in year ten, while she was starting in year seven, a little girl lost amid all the ruthless savagery of preadolescence. Once, Séverine even made a female student supervisor cry. Self-confident and triumphant, she chose her friends and enemies from the jungle where she reigned. Back then, when she had reigned.
“I just wanted to help.”
“We don’t need anything or anybody.”
When she gets home, she finds Jo in the kitchen. Feet on the table, her daughter is putting paprika crisps into the oven after dipping them in yoghurt.
“I’ve never understood how you can eat that.”
Johanna turns away. “I put the dishwasher on.”
Séverine starts emptying it, hanging the saucepans on the wall above the sink in order of size.
“Why are you so angry with Céline?”
The teenager’s voice echoes in the silence of the kitchen, interrupted only by the sound of Pyrex plates her mother is now stacking up in the sideboard. Séverine purses her lips and her cheeks move as though she’s chewing her words before spitting them out. “She deserves it.”
Jo watches her, her and her staring eyes, suddenly lost in the cracks in the wall. “I don’t understand.”