Well that answered the question of Freddy’s sexuality, not that Luke had really been interested to begin with. He was much more interested in Freddy’s observation about submitting to a woman versus a man. It touched a chord within him, even though he hadn’t thought he was that kind of guy, but apparently Freddy had struggled as well which made Luke feel a lot better. Freddy was so confident in himself and who he was, Luke had kind of assumed fully submitting must have come easily to him. At least, more easily than it was to Luke. Luckily, Freddy didn’t even make Luke ask, he just took another sip of his drink and continued his explanation.

“Try explaining to your friends who aren’t into kink that you’re not upset about your girlfriend bossing you around, you find it hot,” Freddy said with an eye roll. “It’s an unfortunately fast way to find out who is a true friend and who buys into toxic masculinity stereotypes which make them uncomfortable being around you. But it still made a lot of my real friends uncomfortable to see women being so ‘aggressive’ or ‘demanding’, as they saw it. There’s a reason most of us in the lifestyle learn not to talk about what we do in the bedroom with anyone who isn’t also in the lifestyle, and why a lot of people who don’t confine their activities to the bedroom tend to make friends with others who are also in the lifestyle or at least play with kink.”

“So what made you decide to continue?” Luke said, feeling a pang of sadness for Freddy. Even though the other man wasn’t being obvious about it, it was clear he was describing a painful time for himself.

“Honestly, I didn’t at the time. I stopped exploring that side of myself for about a year,” Freddy said with a grimace. “Then I hooked up with another woman who had a lot of dominant qualities even though she wasn’t into BDSM. She liked to take control in the bedroom though and it was like… getting a little taste just reawakened the craving. The little bit I got from her wasn’t enough, and I realized I’d spent the past year trying to suppress a part of myself, and for what? So other people could feel more comfortable? About my life and who I am?” He settled back into his seat from where he’d straightened up, blushing a little and taking another long pull of his drink through his straw. “I get a little passionate about it.”