No.

Was all of this as distressing to you as it was to your brother?

It was more than distressing. It is yet. But I hadnt refused to help my father. I hadnt been asked. Mostly I was worried about Bobby. He was in terrible shape.

You really thought he might kill himself.

Yes. I didnt know what I would find when I got there.

And if he had killed himself?

I dont know. I think I probably would have killed myself as quickly as possible and then tried to find him.

You’re joking.

I dont think so.

Do you believe in an afterlife?

I dont believe in this one.

Do you?

I’ve no idea. It strikes me as extremely unlikely. But again the probability is not zero.

We’ve never really talked about why you came back to Stella Maris.

I’d nowhere else to go.

I find it hard to believe that you’d have come here if you hadnt been looking for help of some sort.

If you like.

There are limits to this conversation, arent there? You dont want to jeopardize your walk in the woods? You’re smiling.

Sorry.

No, it’s all right. Whatever my concerns about you, keeping you alive has to be at the head of the list.

What else?

Did Bobby ever go back to Mexico?

No.

Did your father ever come to him again? Isnt that how he put it?

No, he didnt.

I’ve asked you this before but were you close to your father?

No. But I loved him. Then and now.

We’ve just a few more minutes. Tell me something odd about yourself.

Something odd.

Yes.

You’re asking me what’s odd about me?

Yes. Something I might not know. It could even be something trivial.

All right.

Well?

I’m thinking.

Okay.

I can tell time backwards.

What do you mean?

I mean that if I see a clock in a mirror I know what time it is.

So do I.

No you dont. You have to stop and figure it out.

And you dont.

And I dont.

You trained yourself to do this.

I just thought about it.

How did you think about it?

At first I just folded it over. Visually. Like a page.

In your mind. Sorry.

And then after a while I didnt have to fold it over. I could just see it.

What else.

What else what?

I dont know. What else about clocks.

In the mirror the three and the nine reverse in their locations but not the six and the twelve. It’s a child’s question but some grown-ups have a problem with it. If you throw a handful of sticks in the air and photograph them there will be a lot more sticks oriented in the horizontal plane than in the vertical. Why is that? After all, they have the same degrees of freedom.

I dont know.

It’s because a stick rotating in the vertical passes through the horizontal plane midway. And briefly becomes a member. Twice. But a horizontal stick in its rotation has nothing to contribute to the vertical plane. Doesnt seem fair, does it? Images in a closing glass door rotate but they cant bend. Optics. Handedness. Chirality. Color. Questions everywhere.