All of these worries swirl in my stomach until the nausea becomes unbearable. I pause in my walk, then return to my chambers, where I retch in the bathroom until I have nothing left.

No matter what happens, I will suffer. There is no light at the end of these tunnels.

When morning finally dawns, I am weary and moody. I extend one of my steel wings at the young manservant sent in to assist me in washing and dressing, sending him scurrying from my chamber in fright. Guilt flits through me at the sight of his fleeing figure, but I don’t have time to worry about him. Today, I’m off to see where Constantine has decided to keep my mother currently.

Before long, I’m seated in a carriage that takes me to another district in Cardinia. As we pass through the center of the city, I notice fresh paint splashed and scrawled over some of the stone bases of the sculptures that line the thoroughfares.

They distract me for a moment. As the carriage draws near them, I realize that they are rants of fury smeared against the stone.

PUPPET PREMIER

FREEDOM IS A LIE

CUT KARENSA’S THROAT

I stare at them for as long as I can, until our carriage has passed it all and the damage fades in the distance. No doubt someone will scrub them clean as quickly as they can. I wouldn’t have thought much of it, except the advisor’s words at the train station keep coming back to me.

Independence.

Threats against the Premier, scrawled on his precious sculptures.

The thoughts linger with me as we pull away from the city’s center and into small streets.

One look at the district we drive through tells me what I need to know. This time the path to my mother’s current location is a nice one—the open carriage passes through a Cardinian district shaded with mature oaks, the path paved smooth until we reach a set of ornate wrought-iron gates. The road beyond it is cobblestone studded with shining flecks of mica, leading to an estate of white marble and stone, the sound of trickling fountains sweetening the air.

Behind the walls I’ve put up, the knot of terror in my heart loosens somewhat, and I feel my muscles slack a little, the air flowing a little more easily to my lungs. This is how I know Constantine is pleased with me. I’ve accompanied him to Mara and helped him punish prisoners of war by turning them into Ghosts. I’ve helped defend him and our train from espionage and turned my back on Red. I’ve bled my soul for him. In return, my mother will live here for a short reprieve—on the grandest estate I’ve ever seen in my life.

“Welcome to the home of Mayor Elland of Cardinia,” the driver tells me, bowing his head, as the gates open for us. He glances at me with a half-disgusted, half-frightened look. “Her servants will attend to your every need during your stay today. At dusk, my carriage and I will be waiting for you at the manor entrance.”