“We’re broke, Sarah. Broke. In massive debt, actually. I have to sort things out. And it just—” Kiki started pacing. “Look—I make a small salary from my textile company and Arman has work—don’t get me wrong, he’s working and I’m kicking it into higher gear and he’s always got something about to drop but—” Kiki’s eyes were saucers, truly gray. And with her curly hair spilling out of a scarf, her pale skin, and her freckled forearms wrapped around her waist as if she might just go ahead and retch—

“Kiki. What … happened?”

“You mean, ‘Why are you so broke?’ Is that what you’re asking?”

“I mean, I guess I am.”

“Listen to me—oh my God, I’m so sorry. I’m being ridiculous.” Kiki’s hands fluttered in front of her face, as if she were about to sneeze or cry.

Sarah remembered how Kiki had lit candles one Friday evening; she had looked strikingly similar then to how she did now. Kiki had explained to Leda how she waved her hands three times to welcome the Sabbath Queen.

“We’ll work it out.” Kiki nodded. She finally opened her eyes. “We both just have unpredictable careers and we always have. Or at least Arman always has. I’ve just had—y’know—low-paying careers. Look at your face—I’m sorry I’m venting! You bring out this … honesty in me. I’m really sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” Sarah heard such blunt echoes of Leda in her own voice. You’ve got to stop crying. Whose impatience had come first?

“We’ll work it out.”

“I’m sure you will but—”

“Having Sylvie has just made me think about everything differently. Obviously. But I have to take it down a notch. According to Arman, I have to have a little faith.”

Sarah thought of Arman in the car last night, sitting at the table with his head in his hands. Was this the source of his unhappiness? Money trouble? She was ashamed how disappointed she felt. She’d anticipated—hoped for?—real betrayal.

Kiki started walking again and Sarah followed. The path narrowed so they were single file.

“It’s not easy,” Sarah said.

“What part?”

“Oh, I don’t know. The chilling out? The having faith?”

Kiki reached for a low-hanging branch. Sarah thought she was going to pull on it in a burst of frustration, but she only pushed it gently aside and made way for Sarah to pass.

“I wanted a baby,” Kiki said, while still holding on to the branch. “I wanted to be pregnant.”

Sarah didn’t dare say anything. If she let her be, Kiki would eventually continue.