There was much to learn for herself, let alone what she must teach. She would be making so many decisions that would have eternal implications for more people than herself alone. It was a powerful knowledge, as well as a terrible one.

“Would you care for some tea, madam?” Mrs. Elsom asked when she saw Adelaide walking along the corridor.

Adelaide smiled faintly and shook her head. “No, thank you. I think I will just go to the music room and play a while. It gives me peace.”

Mrs. Elsom smiled with a nod. “Very good, madam. Should you need anything, just ring.”

A burst of irritation flickered in Adelaide’s stomach, but she was able to tamp it down. After all, the good woman was simply offering help and service, as was her job, and Adelaide was in a state of being less than able to do everything for herself.

It was no reflection on Mrs. Elsom’s opinions of her, nor an implication that Adelaide was a weak creature.

Even though she was, for the present.

Oh, this entire thing was hopeless. She was never going to have her body returned to her the way it had once been, and she was never going to feel as she did before she became with child. She would never be able to walk the stairs without losing her breath, get out of a chair with grace, walk without feeling as though she were on a sailing ship, or sleep through the entire night ever again.

At least sitting at the pianoforte gave her something to do while she sat, and there was something about the music that settled her child within her, which made everything feel better.

The music room was filled with the early spring light streaming through the large windows, and she exhaled happily. She was not talented on the instrument yet, nor may she ever be, but she did derive pleasure from playing it. Julia had been kind enough to give her plenty of simple tunes to play, some of them formal pieces she had heard in London before, others that were more common songs that might be whistled by villagers or sung as lullabies.

She situated herself on the bench, determined not to switch to a chair with a back until she could no longer sit upright. She played through a number of pieces, her child jumping about within her without making her particularly uncomfortable, then, when she selected a lullaby, settled against her left upper ribs as comfortably as though it were a pillow.

There was nothing to do but smile at the sensation. She could almost picture the babe, could nearly see its tiny nose and plump cheeks, perhaps with dark hair like Basset. She wondered at its ability to find such comfort and consolation with her when she had no way with children and no tendency toward warmth and gentleness.