Contents (11)
Distraction, boredom and, truth be told, the Get kept him jumping from department to department (and finally drove him out of both Northwestern and Chicago altogether, without any degree, despite his nearly perfect academic record).
Still, he’d picked up some insights in various classes. He was thinking of one now, recalling the neo-Gothic classroom overlooking the north shore of Lake Michigan. Psychology. March had been fascinated to learn that there are only five basic fears.
For instance, take the fear of sharks, one that particularly interested him. That’s merely a subcategory of the fear of mutilation: having part of our body damaged or excised. More broadly, fear of injury.
The four other basic fears: of physical death, of ego death (embarrassment and shame), of separation (from Mommy, from the drugs we inhale so desperately, from our lover) and of loss of autonomy (from claustrophobia on a physical level to being abused by a parent or spouse, for instance).
March remembered the cold November day when he’d heard about these in a lecture. Truly mesmerizing.
And now he was about to put several of them to good use. Fear of physical death, of mutilation and of loss of autonomy, all rolled into one. A movie theater would be his next target.
He had parked his car in a strip mall about a hundred yards from the Marina Hills Cineplex, just off Highway 1 in Marina. He was walking toward the theaters now.
Don’t we love the comfort of the lights going down, the trailers coming to an end, the film starting? Waiting to be exhilarated, amused, thrilled—laughing or crying. Why is a theater so much better than Netflix or cable? Because the real world is gone.
Until the real world comes crashing in.
In the form of smoke or gunshots.
And then comfort becomes constriction.
Fear of physical death, fear of mutilation and, most deliciously, fear of loss of autonomy—when the crowd takes over. You become a helpless cell in a creature whose sole goal is to survive, yet in attempting to do that it will sacrifice some of itself: those cells trampled or suffocated or changed forever thanks to snapped spines or piercing ribs.
He now examined the cineplex, regarding the parking lot, the entrance, the service doors. This was one of the older multiplexes in the area, dating to the seventies—it featured only four theaters, ranging from three hundred seats to six hundred. It showed first-run movies, along with an occasional art film, and competed with the big boy up at Del Monte Center by discounting tickets (if you were fifty-nine, you were a senior. How ’bout that?) and offering free cheese powder with the popcorn (which was still overpriced).
March knew this because after meeting with an Indonesian tsunami relief charity for the Hand to Heart website he’d been to see a film here: When She’s Alone, a slasher flick, which wasn’t bad—like a lot of such films nowadays, in this age of inexpensive technology, the effects were good and the acting passable. Some clever motifs (stained glass, for instance; the colored shards turned out to be the killer’s weapon of choice).