“First, I’m always awkward. You know this. And second, he specifically didn’t invite me. He said he would ask me to stop by, but house parties aren’t my thing, so he didn’t ask. And you know what? He’s right. They aren’t my thing!” I snap at her. It has zero effect. She’s painfully pigheaded and ruthless when she thinks she’s right. It’s one of the things that makes her such a great dictator.

Stalin would be so proud.

“Please, that’s just what guys say when they want to invite you, but they’re afraid you won’t show.” Her dismissive tone grates on my nerves. My parents used that tone with me my whole life. It makes me feel about two inches tall.

“That’s not how it sounded in his truck. It was very much a dis-invitation,” I practically scream at her. I’m sick of her making me second-guess myself.

“And what did he say when you got out of the truck?” she asks, already knowing the answer. Why do I share things when she only ever uses them against me?

“That he wanted to make me feel like the sexual goddess he knows I am.” My cheeks flush when I remember the heat in Austin’s stunning blue eyes last night. Those words, that look, his kiss. Even just the memory undoes me.

Of course I want to see him again tonight, but I’m terrified he doesn’t want to see me. I’m not his girlfriend. I’m not even really his friend.

Just this weird girl who is paying him for sex.

Jackie can read me like a book. The wistfulness in my voice is blood in the water and Jackie’s a shark.

“That’s an invitation to get fucked, sister.”

“It so wasn’t. I’m not going to show up there like some creepy obsessed fangirl.”

“Then don’t go for him. Go for you. It is a party. I’m sure there are plenty of other guys you can practice your new moves on.” My heart revolts at the thought. I don’t want anyone else’s hands on me.

Or to see Austin’s hands on someone else.

He doesn’t belong to me. He could be with anyone he wants tonight. The realization makes my lunch want to make an encore appearance. Why am I jealous? He isn’t my boyfriend.

But you wish he was.

Shut it, brain. No one asked you. Maybe Jackie is right. I can go to the party as practice. What’s wrong with that? If I happen to see Austin, no big deal.

Liar.

“Maybe…” My willpower is fading.

“Good, we’ve decided you’re going. Now, go put on that black dress I sent you for your birthday last year.” Jackie pounces faster than a lion on a wounded gazelle.