Chapters (10)
I thought I could not bear, when I recovered myself that he should be so near, and not once call in, and enquire after the health of the creature for whom he proiessed so high an esteem, and even af-fection: but when, on my return to company, my * See Letters iii. iv, v. D 2 grandmamma related what passed between them, and the letters were read; then again were mj failing spirits unable to support me. They all gazed upon me, as the letters were reading, as well as while my grandmamma was giving the relation of what he said: and of the noble, the manly air with which he delivered himself. — With joy and silent congratulation they gazed upon me; while I felt such a variety of sensibilities in my heart, as I never felt before; sensibilities mixed with wonder; and I was sometimes ready to doubt whether I were not in a reverie; whether indeed I was in this world, or another; whether I was Harriet Byron I know not how to describe what I felt in my now fluttering, now rejoicing, now dejected heart
Dejected? Yes, my dear Lady G. Dejection was a strong ingredient in my sensibilities. I know not why. Yet may there not be a fulness in joy, that will mingle dissatisfaction with it? If there may, shall I be excused for my solemnity, if I deduce from thence an argument, that the human soul is not to be fully satisfied by w orldly enjoyments; and that therefore the completion of its happiness must be in another, a more perfect state? You, Lady G. are a very good woman, though a lively one; and I will not excuse you, if on an occasion that bids me look forward to a very solemn event, you will not forgive my seriousness. That bids me Look fonvard, I repeat; for ISir Charles Grandison cannot alter his mind: the world has not wherewith to tempt him to alter it, after he has made such advances; except I misbehave.
Well, my dear, and what was the result of our conference? My grandmamma, my aunt, and Lucy, were of opinion, that I ought no more to re-volve the notions of a divided or second-placed love: that every point of female delicacy was answered: that he ought not only still to be allowed to love
Lady Clementina, but that I and all her sex should revere hor: that my grandmamma, being the person applied to, should answer for nie, for us all, in words of her own choosing.
I was silent. What think;/o?/, my dear? said my aunt.
Think! said my uncle, with his usual facetiousness; Do you think, if Harriet had one objection, she would have been silent? I am for sending up for Sir Charles directly. Let him come the first day of next week, and let them be married before the end of it.