He darts a glance towards the kitchen door, checks the playroom is still quiet and takes a deep breath. ‘Listen, darling,’ he says, and heaves a deep sigh, as if what he is going to say is going to hurt him even more than it’s going to hurt me. ‘I would like to make my position entirely clear,’ he goes on to announce, as if he’s someone else, not Ralph, addressing not his wife, but a court of law. ‘You know my line on this. It’s never altered one iota since Posy. I don’t want a fourth child. We’ve got three children, and that seems to be more than enough for you to cope with already. Aren’t three children enough? What’s wrong with the three children we already have?’

He looks at me imploringly, but my heart is too full of sadness to answer. ‘I never wanted more and, my love, I’m sorry, but I never will. I thought you were on the Pill. How on earth did it happen? Did you stop taking it? Whatever the case, it now appears that you’re pregnant. I’ve no idea how this happened,’ he continues (like Dr Ashburton, Ralph seems personally, even deeply let down by the tiresome propensity of women of child-bearing age to conceive after enjoying marital relations with their husbands, whose role in the conception is at this point conveniently forgotten). ‘But I can only assume that you allowed yourself to forget the Pill, and then you present me with a fait accompli,’ he continues, holding up a hand when I start protesting that I did, actually, remember to take the Pill, actually, only just not at the same time every day, to convey that he had no time or inclination to hear my pathetic excuses.

I know it was stupid of me to slip up, but I still idiotically thought that Ralph would take it on the chin after the initial blow had worn off, that he would square his shoulders, give me a manly hug and say, ‘You silly old goose. Stop crying. Whatever you decide to do, I’ll support you. I want you to know that despite my repeated refusals to give in to your wish to have yet another baby after Posy was born eight years ago, for all the reasons I have always spelt out, I would be truly honoured if you would consider having my child.’