‘In a good place,’ I repeat. What I am thinking is – if I hadn’t been through all that, I wouldn’t be here now. I am almost feeling grateful for all the misery and heartache of the last few months, simply because the contrast of the long dark winter of the soul with these sunlit uplands is so heavenly I can almost taste it, and I know what Clare meant when she said to me, as she left, holding my hand, ‘Today is a gift, Mimi. That’s why it’s called the present.’

‘Is that an expression of Granville’s… or Clare’s?’ Ralph asks, with a slight but tender hesitancy.

I think it is very brave of Ralph to say her name, to show that we have moved on and that the Clare business is behind us. As far as it ever can be.

‘I’ve just explained what it means,’ I say. ‘It means, you know. In a good place. It means, like, happy. Are you?’

But I decide not to say anything about Granville or Clare. Or psychotherapy. I decide to put all thoughts of Clare and Joe away, to be taken out and looked at later. When I have the strength, and when I am slim again, which may be many years hence if my past record on post-partum digestive-biscuit intake is anything to go by.

I move over the flag-stoned floor to the warmth of the recessed fireplace.

‘Of course I’m happy,’ he says. Ralph could never use a phrase like ‘in a good place’ without physical pain. I know now that he wanted me to have an abortion because he was terrified about having fathered Clare’s child, a fourth child, that could never be ours, an act of madness he claims he committed when he was in a panic about money, and the legal and moral consequences of which he admits he did not weigh up with enough care, an omission for which he declares he will hold himself to account until his dying day.

He comes over, his waders making little squeaking noises on the stone floor. I have taken up my traditional position at the Aga, my hand holding the barre of the silver rail, in the first position. Then I go into second position, and do a grand plié.

In my head, for months, I have been plotting my future, where I will make myself a very rich woman, as a result of my own, Mimi Malone, patented ‘Agacise’ exercise manual, ‘Agacise’ DVD, ‘Agacise’ cookbook – indeed, the whole ‘Agacise’ way of life, and I now decide to add a whole chapter about Aga exercises and recipes for pregnancy and – yes! Aga babyfood – to the bestsellering tome.

I know that ‘Agacise’ will one day make me rich, so rich that I might even be able, one day, to buy Posy, if not another pony, and definitely not a unicorn, at least a pet lamb.