Lex is watching me. Red eyebrows drawn together. Nibbling on his lower lip. I’ve already come to recognize it as his worried face. “Did something happen?” he asks.

“No,” I say, but I’m still shaking. “I just . . .” I stop and take a deep breath. Try to come up with something that will make sense to Lex. And to me. “It was just a lot, you know? Becoming Eden. Being on the stage where my mom used to act.” And it sounds so rational when I say it like that. Because of course it’s been a lot.

It’s a mindfuck. Right?

A huge fucking mindfuck.

Lex nods. “After everything that happened last night, I thought today might be hard.”

“It’s just been weird,” I say. “I talked to Willa, and that was great. But so strange, you know?”

“I can’t even imagine what this must be like for you.” Lex smiles. His eyes are so bright. “But how cool that Willa wants to get to know you. I can’t believe you ate lunch with her!” He collapses against me, and I can’t help but smile, too. “Tell me everything.”

“She told me all kinds of stuff I never knew about my mom. Just little details, but it all felt so important, you know? Because I never get that from my dad.”

“That’s intense.” Lex is looking at me. “No wonder you’re a little freaked out.”

“Yeah,” I say.

A little freaked out.

It’s quiet for a minute, except for the always-present sound of the waves down at the beach.

“It’ll be weird when we get to that scene, huh?” Lex’s worried look is back.

“What scene?”

He’s staring at me. “The end of act one.” Lex blinks. “The scene where Eden drowns.”

Shit.

It’s not like I didn’t know that happened. But I hadn’t really thought about it until the words came out of Lex’s mouth.

How many times will I have to drown in my life?

Once when I was five.

Over and over in my dreams.

Again tonight in the bathroom.

And how many times onstage? During these weeks of rehearsal as Eden.

Then the performance, of course.

The idea scares me, but I file it away. Tuck it into a drawer and slam it closed.

The concrete is hard and cold underneath me, and I shift positions. There’s no way to get comfortable, though.

“They put out cushions all along the risers,” Lex tells me. “When they have a show out here. That’s what Jude says.”

“How are things going with Jude?” Lex’s face turns red, and his freckles glow like hot coals. “He’s adorable,” I say.

“He is.” Lex grins. “I know.” Then that darkness drifts across his face, and I wonder again what his story is.