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Chapters (46)
  1. Tyler was gasping, coughing, his hands on the pavement.
  2. Title Page
  3. Table of Contents
  4. Dedication
  5. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  6. PROLOGUE
  7. CHAPTER 1
  8. CHAPTER 2
  9. CHAPTER 3
  10. CHAPTER 4
  11. CHAPTER 5
  12. CHAPTER 6
  13. CHAPTER 7
  14. CHAPTER 8
  15. CHAPTER 9
  16. CHAPTER 10
  17. CHAPTER 11
  18. CHAPTER 12
  19. CHAPTER 13
  20. CHAPTER 14
  21. CHAPTER 15
  22. CHAPTER 16
  23. CHAPTER 17
  24. CHAPTER 18
  25. CHAPTER 19
  26. CHAPTER 20
  27. CHAPTER 21
  28. CHAPTER 22
  29. CHAPTER 23
  30. CHAPTER 24
  31. CHAPTER 25
  32. CHAPTER 26
  33. CHAPTER 27
  34. CHAPTER 28
  35. CHAPTER 29
  36. CHAPTER 30
  37. CHAPTER 31
  38. CHAPTER 32
  39. CHAPTER 33
  40. CHAPTER 34
  41. CHAPTER 35
  42. CHAPTER 36
  43. BEYOND THE STORY
  44. AFTERWORD
  45. SECRET PLAYLIST
  46. Copyright Page

“That’s not good enough.” Nick gritted his teeth. “You shouldn’t have been fighting him. You shouldn’t have put your hands on him.”

“I know. And I apologized to him.”

Nick’s head was reeling. “What? When?”

“This morning, when I called him and asked what time his audition was.”

Nick stared at him.

“I told him not to tell you,” Gabriel added. He hesitated. “I didn’t think you’d let me come.”

Nick wouldn’t have. He had to clear his throat. “What else did you talk about?”

“I asked him why you thought you had to keep this a secret from me.”

Nick glared at him. “You know why. You showed why.”

“No.” And on this, Gabriel’s voice was firm. “I acted like a total shit that night. I apologized for it, and I’ll do it a hundred more times if I have to. But you went to a lot of trouble to keep this secret, way before we went to that coffee shop. Jesus, Nick, two weeks ago you and Quinn were making out on the floor of your bedroom.”

Nick looked away.

Gabriel leaned close, and his voice was very quiet. “Please. Please, talk to me.”

Nick had to swallow. He felt his brother’s pain in those words, how much this imposed distance had hurt him. If Nick was being strictly honest with himself, it had hurt him, too. He missed his brother.

He kept his voice very low. “What did Adam say?”

Gabriel grimaced. “He said I needed to ask you.”

“I knew you already thought of me as . . . as something lesser. I didn’t—”

“Nick, you are not—”

“Don’t. Gabriel, don’t.”

“I have never thought you were lesser, Nick. Never. Do you understand me? Sometimes—sometimes I envy you. Your control—you’re stronger than the rest of us.”

Nick looked at him. “I am not.”

Gabriel nodded. “You are. Look at what happened in the woods.”

Nick didn’t say anything to that. His eyes fixed on the seat in front of him again.

“Nicky—” Gabriel made a frustrated noise. “Nick. If you think you’re lesser because of the whole gay thing, that’s just insane—”

“Is it?” Nick snapped his head around, suddenly furious again. “You made it so easy to tell you all about it.”

Gabriel flinched. He swallowed. “You’re right.” He paused. “I was wrong. So wrong.”

They sat there in silence for the longest time, the air full of music and unspoken thoughts.

Finally Nick cut a glance sideways. “I didn’t—I didn’t trust you not to let me down. That’s why I didn’t tell you.”

“And when you took a chance, I blew it.” He paused. “You needed me. For the first time, you really needed me.”

Nick looked at him. “Yeah, Gabriel. I did.”