“The vast majority of you, I note, are regular guests and clients, familiar with the rules of our House and the regulations that apply during auctions. Everybody here was given on entry a brochure containing the regulations. I thus presume that you are all informed regarding the rules and aware of the consequences of breaking them. Let us then begin without delay.

“Lot number one: a nephrite group figure, depicting a nymph… hmm… with three fauns… It was made, according to our experts, by gnomes, dated as being a hundred years old. Starting price: two hundred crowns. I see two hundred and fifty. Going once. Going twice. Going three times. Sold to the gentleman with number thirty-six.”

Two clerks perched at neighbouring desks diligently wrote down the results of the sales.

“Lot number two: Aen N’og Mab Taedh’morc, a collection of elven tales and poems. Richly illustrated. Mint condition. Starting price: five hundred crowns. Five hundred and fifty, to Merchant Hofmeier. Councillor Drofuss, six hundred. Mr. Hofmeier, six hundred and fifty. No more bids? Sold for six hundred and fifty crowns to Mr. Hofmeier of Hirundum.

“Lot number three: an ivory device, of a… hmm… curved and elongated shape… hmm… probably used for massage. Foreign provenance, age unknown. Starting price: a hundred crowns. To my left, a hundred and fifty. Two hundred, the lady in the mask with number forty-three. Two hundred and fifty, the lady in the veil with number eight. Do I hear three hundred? Three hundred, to the wife of apothecary Vorsterkranz. Three hundred and fifty! Going for the last time. Sold for three hundred and fifty crowns to the lady with number forty-three.

“Lot number four: Antidotarius magnus, a unique medical treatise, published by Castell Graupian University at the beginning of the academy’s existence. Starting price: eight hundred crowns. I see eight hundred and fifty. Doctor Ohnesorg, Nine hundred. One thousand, the Honourable Marti Sodergren. Any more bids? Sold for one thousand crowns to the Honourable Sodergren.

“Lot number five: Liber de naturis bestiarum, a rare edition, bound in beechwood boards, ornately illustrated…

“Lot number six: Girl with a Kitten, portrait en trois quarts, oil on canvas, the Cintran school. Starting price…

“Lot number seven: a bell with a handle, brass, dwarven work, the age of the item is difficult to ascertain, but it is without doubt antique. There is an engraving on the rim in dwarven runes, reading: ‘Why are you ringing it, you twat?’ Starting price…

“Lot number eight: oils and tempera on canvas, artist unknown. A masterpiece. Please observe the rare use of colour, the play of pigments and the dynamics of the light. The semi-dark mood and the splendid colours of a majestically rendered sylvan landscape. And please note the main figure in the work’s central position: a stag in its rutting ground, in atmospheric chiaroscuro. Starting price…