In my heart I’m screaming, I do want to be with you! That’s the problem. I want him and I can’t have him.

How do I tell him how I feel without actually telling him?

I rub my forehead with my fingertips, frustrated. I take a breath and say, “Grayson, my job is everything to me. Everything. I’ve worked really damn hard to get where I am today, and I’m still not where I want to be. I want to go further. I want to be state attorney someday. And I won’t do anything that will risk that happening.”

He leans down and picks his ball back up. Holding it between his large palms, he stares down at it while he says to me, “I get that, Mel. I do. I really wish I didn’t, but I do understand.” His eyes come back up to mine. “But I have to know. If things were different. If I wasn’t up on this charge. And we were just who we are, and I kissed you—”

I cut him off. “If you weren’t up on this charge then we wouldn’t know each other. We don’t exactly run in the same social circles.”

“Stop evading and just answer the damn question.”

My mouth goes dry. He knows the truth. He knows I’d be with him in a heartbeat. I don’t know why he’s forcing me to say it.

Saying it out loud will do neither of us any good. It’ll just remind us of the reason we can’t be together. So I choose not to say it. I choose to remind him of why we can’t be together.

“I’m the assistant state attorney who’s prosecuting you, Grayson. Outside of that, nothing else matters. ‘What ifs’ and ‘maybes’ are pointless. What matters is the here and now, and that means that what happened last night will never happen again.”

Chapter 15

Grayson’s face darkens. Anger and frustration and sadness all flicker through his eyes. It’s a hell of a combination to see. His jaw is clenched tight and the muscles in his face work angrily. “I don’t accept that,” he says, and throws the ball to the ground. Just like that, my face is in his hands, his body is pressed against mine, and he’s kissing me all over again.

This time I don’t stop him. I couldn’t if I wanted to. My body is weak to him. He kisses me with a passion and intensity that I’ve never before known.

Breaking from my mouth, he presses his forehead to mine. “How can you be sorry for kissing me when it feels like this?” he asks, brushing his lips over mine. “I want you. You want me. We can make this work.”

I open my eyes. “How? Because I can’t see a way we can work.”

“Take yourself off the case. If you’re not the one prosecuting me, then there’s no problem.”

“I can’t do that,” I say, shaking my head. I have to see his case through. And if what I overheard earlier is true, then Ben, my boss, whom I once admired, might be trying to set Grayson up for a big fall for his own gain. Financial and political. And if I’m not there, I don’t know who will stop him.