Smiling, I joined him at the railing and mimicked his pose, and we stared at the distant mountains for several heartbeats. In this quiet moment before dawn, the world was silent, peaceful. I wished I could feel the same, but the raging storm of questions inside made that impossible. I wondered where we would go next. I wondered where Dante was, what he was doing, what he was planning now. I wondered if there would come a time when I could stop running. If someday Talon and St. George would just stop killing each other, if the war would ever cease.

“Ember.”

Garret’s voice, soft and hesitant, broke the predawn stillness. He kept his gaze on the horizon, but his whole posture was stiff, tense. “You never answered me last night.”

My stomach turned inside out, and everything around us froze. Garret straightened and turned, keeping one hand on the railing, to face me, metallic gaze burning the side of my head. A little flutter of panic bloomed inside. I kept my gaze on a distant street lamp, watching it flicker against the coming dawn, and felt the silence stretch between us, brittle and terrifying. My heart pounded, screaming at me to say something, to give him the words he was waiting for. But I didn’t know if I could…feel like that. When I was with him, I was happy. When we touched, my heart beat faster and my stomach did crazy cartwheels. When we were apart, I thought of him constantly, and when we were together, I was content. But I didn’t know if that was love.

And how could I love him, when a part of me longed for Cobalt, standing in the very next room?

“What do you want me to say, Garret?” I whispered at last.

Garret didn’t answer for a moment, then took a quiet breath, as if bracing himself. “I just want the truth,” he said, and his voice wasn’t angry or cold or demanding, just resigned. Sad. “I have never felt…anything like this. And I know that I’m the last person in the world that deserves it, but…I meant it when I said that I’m in love with you.” His voice wavered on the last sentence, then grew stronger, almost defiant. “I love you, Ember,” he said again, and I closed my eyes. “I’m not ashamed, and I’m not afraid of what it means. But I…I need to know if you feel the same.”

He was putting all his cards on the table, leaving himself wide-open, and I was probably going to rip his heart out. I wanted to tell him. I wanted to say I felt the same, but at the same time, I didn’t want to lie to him. My emotions were a chaotic swirl of confusion and doubt. Garret. Cobalt. Longing. Love. Which was stronger? How did people even know if they were in love?