“I’m just a waiter.” Grayson looked around the company town. The lights in the houses were all going out. I didn’t know if there was a curfew, and someone would come around and yell at us, the generators wheezing off, or if people just wanted to save their candles and kerosene. Grayson’s boot thudded on the van hood. “If I stay here, I can at least help my folks.”

“Don’t sacrifice your life to help your family.”

I was aware, as I said it, of the postcard from California in my truck. Of the reason we had left the farm. Of the farm itself. Not my idea, not my dream, just a dream I had inherited.

“What life?” Grayson said. “Back home, maybe I could’ve worked my way up to manager eventually, if the restaurant had stayed open. I could’ve squatted in a trailer on somebody’s land, or in a house with a bunch of other folks until we got kicked out for being late on the rent or noise or some other crap. It’s not like I could ever own my own house. It’s not like I could have a great job.”

With the lights off, the town was turning silver, crested over with snow. It was too cold to sit outside, but still we sat, watching the shadows around the houses. There was a sliver of moon, as thin as a razor. It slid in and out of the clouds.

“Maybe this weather is a great big equalizer,” Grayson said. “Everybody has to start fresh.”

I thought of Mica in the forest. “Some people are starting out with more.”

Grayson slid off the hood. The newspaper in his coat made his arms rustle. “Damn, Wil. If anyone knows how to do more with less, it’s us.”

As we readied to leave, I knew Grayson was there, but if I didn’t look closely, he blended into the congregation, bundled in his warm things. It was like when The Church had left, when I couldn’t find Lisbeth in the vans. I was losing her again. I was losing two people.

I got into the truck.

Was this what a wedding was like—everybody standing there, watching, waiting for you to do the thing you already knew in your heart was wrong? When my mama married my daddy, leaving was already in him, like searching was in her. There was something in the blood, some kind of pull. I couldn’t change my mind now and stay, or insist Grayson and Lisbeth come with us. It was too late. People were lined up on either side of the truck, getting impatient and cold. Jamey was making faces in the mirror. Starla needed to nap.