Then the call came from my mother, saying she urgently needed me home. I’d spent the car ride trying to figure out how to tell James I might want to go back for my doctorate, definitely wanted to start a career. I’d arrived home to get the news that I’d been adopted, and my world shattered.

Maybe someone else would see that image and say, “You silly fool—you should have been happy with what you had, not whining that you wanted more.” But I didn’t.

I’m sorry, James. I loved you. I really did. But that wasn’t the life for me. I just wish…

Two tears fell before I wiped them away, and I glanced at Gabriel, but he was looking in a mirror. I wanted to ask what he saw, but before I could, I caught another image: me on the back of Ricky’s bike, roaring through the hills of the Cabot Trail.

I was holding Ricky tight and grinning and thinking how happy I was, how incredibly happy I was. I had a shitty apartment, a demanding boss, a new job that scared the crap out of me, an adoptive mother who’d abandoned me for Europe and a biological one who was definitely a killer. But my father wasn’t a killer. I loved that terrifying new job. I loved Cainsville. And I’d been in love with this amazing guy. What more could I want?

What more indeed.

Was I still that girl with my fathers, hungry for excitement, the next big thrill? Was I still the young woman with James, dreaming of a more fulfilling life? Was I really a silly fool, never satisfied with what I had, always aiming for the next rung up the ladder?

I loved Ricky. Still did. Always would. Yet as with James, there would always be that sense that we didn’t quite fit, that something was missing, that I could be happier…

I looked over at Gabriel. He stood in front of a mirror, staring at his reflection. I reached for his hand. Then I remembered what happened in the dark maze and stopped myself.