‘I know he does.’

She reaches across the table and grabs my wrist. ‘Loves you like crazy, one hundred per cent. We both do.’

‘I love you, too. Might be enough wine for now. How about I put this back in the fridge?’

She keeps hold of my wrist. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Don’t worry about it. I’ve seen you sloshed before.’

‘Really, really sorry.’

I smile at her. ‘Is it my straw hat? I never thought I’d get it back anyway.’

‘You’re my best friend.’

I sit up straight, my hand still on the wine box.

‘It didn’t mean anything. Nothing. Which is not to say – you know, it does mean something or we wouldn’t be having this conversation, would we? The important thing is you’re my best friend and that’s more important than any bloke. It’s urges, biology, but we should be, I mean, there’s no excuse. I’m not excusing anything.’ She seems to lose her train of thought. I’ve never seen her quite this drunk before. ‘Because that’s what they want, isn’t it? Women against women. But we’re sisters aren’t we, so that won’t happen.’ She pauses. ‘It’s over. You can be sure about that. Hundred per cent.’

‘Okay.’ I nod, trying to figure out what she’s telling me. Has she had a fling with Charlie? My God, with Finn? No, she hasn’t met him.

She makes a childish pout. ‘Because at the time you might not recognise a mistake, body chemicals take over, but then . . . And then you do it again. That part is harder to explain away. But I know it was a mistake – huge mistake.’

‘Charlie?’ I ask.

She frowns at me. ‘What?’

‘Did you and Charlie –?’

‘God no.’ She stares up at the sky. ‘Though not out of the ballpark.’ She squeezes my hand. ‘You and me would make more sense, you know. Though I’ve never been physically attracted to a woman. But mentally, I’m much more into you. Boobs though, boobs are good.’ She looks off into the backyard, where the children are playing with the totem tennis pole, using their hands to fling the ball around. ‘It was the flood, you know, seeing him so ape-man rescuing me and the kids. Andrew should’ve been here but –’ She waves vaguely at the house. ‘Doesn’t excuse the times that came after that, I know. And like I said, hundred per cent finished.’ She takes a deep breath, nods vigorously. ‘Finished.’

It’s as though I’m watching a hideous beast rise up from the deep sea, seeing its black shadow first, then the glint of its wet back until it rears up to its full height, enormous and terrifying, all claws and fangs. My voice is thin, unfamiliar. ‘Mark? You and Mark? No.’ I yank my hand away from her. ‘No. You’re my friend.’

‘It’s over. Finished, I swear.’

‘No. Stop talking.’ The only words I wanted to hear were that I’d misunderstood, that she’d meant something entirely different and I’d jumped to a crazy conclusion. Charlie, Finn, even Dad! Because she would never have sex with my husband. I must have got it wrong. She’d laugh, put her hand on her chest in horror that I could even think that. I’d sigh with relief, and we’d share another drink. But she won’t stop saying what I cannot hear.