Escorting me to Titan Mercantile was just another day at work for Jared, but as often as I asked him to come in, it had become an inside joke between us. Every day I asked, and every day he politely declined. For years the halls of Titan Mercantile were walked by Jared’s father Gabe. Jared didn’t talk about it, but I assumed his refusal to go in had to do with unresolved feelings concerning his father.

The hours before dawn crept by slowly, and after my shower, Jared and I spent the remaining moments of twilight at the breakfast table. When the morning sun finally poked through the blinds, I smiled at the glowing light painting rectangles against the walls. I had spent hours staring at those walls, waiting for my leg to heal. Beth visited infrequently, busy decorating her new apartment, Kim had taken her summer vacation on the road, and Claire was relentlessly eliminating any threat to us. Jared spent much of his time warding off loneliness, and keeping me entertained. We had grown closer, and life had been more normal than ever. The only reminder of the night I almost died was the scar on my thigh.

Jared working busily in the kitchen caught my eye, and I listened to the pan pop and sizzle with our breakfast. He placed omelets on the table along with a small stack of mail.

“Anything interesting?” I asked as he thumbed through the envelopes.

Jared paused, eyes narrowing as he read over the handwritten address.

“What?”

“It’s for you,” he said, sliding it toward me.

The top left corner explained Jared’s expression. It was from Ryan.

By Jared’s expression, I knew it wasn’t good news. “You already know, don’t you?” I said, pulling out a single sheet of notebook paper.

“I have an idea.”

“Something you should have told me by now,” I accused, scanning the letter quickly.

Dear Nigh,

I wanted you to hear it from me, but don’t know how to say it, so I’m just going to write it. I’m not coming back to Brown. I talked it over with an Army recruiter and I feel that it’s the best place for me at this point. I know you better than you think I do, and right now you’re feeling guilty. Well, don’t. You’re happy and that’s all that matters to me, and that’s the truth. I’m sorry you have to find out in this stupid letter, but everything happened kinda fast and I didn’t have time to call. Take care of yourself, Nigh. I’ll think about you every day.

Ryan

The letter slipped from my hands and fell to the floor, quiet and slow. The numbness was unexpected but welcome; I knew the guilt that would soon wash over me would be unbearable.

“He left.”

Jared touched my hand. “Claire called. He’s doing well.”