He expected more harsh rebukes and fiery condemnation. What he got instead was a look of surprised distress, like Aldric had just admitted to never being hugged as a child.

He wished she would just yell at him more. It was easier to deal with.

“Aldric, what is wrong with you?” she asked, completely sincere in her confusion.

“That’s a broad question. How much time you got?”

“I’m serious, Aldric! Are you simply incapable of caring at this point? I have half a mind to believe you did this on purpose.” She ran her hands over wet eyes in a rare show of weakness. “At least at the beginning, you stayed out of trouble. You would just sit there like a corpse the whole time, but I could monitor you, mostly. I was so terrified that you were going to stay that way. When you started acting up, I hoped it was better than what you had been, but looking at what you’ve become...” Zasia trailed off as she gave him a look of profound disappointment. It was the same look that tore at his insides every time he saw it. It had the effect of spiking his mood to sudden, angry heights.

“By all the gods above, Zasia, I’m not him!” he screamed. “I’m not the Aldric you want me to be. You know it, I know it, Kedrin knows it. Hell, those stupid brats out there know it, and they’ve only just met me!”

“I don’t believe that!” Zasia countered, shouting along with him now. “I saw how you lit up when you were talking about magic today. How you had a life to you I haven’t seen in almost a decade. Don’t tell me you felt nothing at all! Aldric, you are so ludicrously talented, and those kids could learn so much from you. It hurts so much that you won’t just—”

“SO WHAT!” The words exploded from Aldric, with enough pain and anguish that it surprised even himself. He caught Zasia mid-sentence, her eyes wide. “If I could bundle up my talent and throw it in the nearest river, I would. Look where it got me, Zasia,” He gestured wildly to the spartan and dusty room around him, filled with boxes of memories from a life he couldn’t have anymore. “I’m nothing! I have nothing! If you want your Aldric back, you’re going to have to go find his grave and dig him up, ‘cause he’s NOT HERE!”

“Aldric...” Zasia choked out, but he didn’t let her finish, couldn’t let her finish. Anything to make that damn look of hers leave him alone.