Kevin was watching me. Of course I had things to say. I’d said them in those nighttime fantasies as I beat him, long, streaming descriptions of everything he had taken from me. But now as I tried to speak, my throat tightened, strangling the words. How could I say anything? How could I put what this man had done into words? Kevin was watching me, waiting for me to tell him about my pain. I’d glimpsed him at the back of the Lord Chesterton with all the strangers who had come to hear me, wanting me to lay it all out, every wound, every embarrassment, every longing ache. Kevin and I watched each other. He knew. I could see it in his eyes. He knew what he had done to me, and he wasn’t sorry. He had the look of a man surveying his creation. The master of ceremonies. Because, in the end, we were all here on this bloodied, darkened stage because of him. We were all his puppets. Well, it would stop now. I was not going to spout the lines he had written for me. I was not going to let him die in the final act and cement this cruel life, this nightmare he’d created for me.

“No,” I said. “I don’t have anything to say to him.”

Dale was trembling with rage. He strode forward, mechanically, at Khalid’s glance and took a pistol from his hand.

“But this can’t—” I said. I looked at Linda and Sharon for help. “This can’t go on.”

“Ted, this is all outside your control.” Khalid put a hand up, calm. “You may not be happy about this right now, but it’s happening. This. Is. Happening. It’s going to be good for you in the future, when you think back on it. Just trust me, bro.”

“Dale.” My voice was rising, echoing off the walls of the vast, dark space. “You can’t let this happen. This is what he wants. This is what they want. Dale? Dale! Stop! You can’t do this. Dale, you can’t!”

I took a step toward him. No more than one. Linda’s great arm swept around my neck and tightened, dragging me back. I grabbed at the arm. Slippery fabric. Impossibly hard muscle underneath. “No! No No No!”

Khalid was untying Kevin’s hands. The young man fell onto the floor. Dale, so much bigger now than I’d ever known him, thicker, wider, full of fire. Every muscle in the man’s neck and jaw was standing out, straining, as he kicked and stomped on the man on the ground. I tried to shake Linda off. Sank to the ground. He sank with me, putting the pressure on, cutting off my air, making my eyes pulse.

“Please, no!” I cried. “I need him alive. I need him alive!”