Queenie clapped her hands together, twice. ‘I knew it! I bloody well knew it! You’re working in one of those strip clubs, ain’t ya? You can’t pull the wool over my eyes for long, boy. As soon as I realized your hotel never existed, I knew you were working in one of those places where all those perverts flock to. Disgusting!’

Vinny breathed a sigh of relief. This was much better than his mum knowing where he was really working. He held his hands up. ‘I surrender. You’re right. But I’m only working on the door, Mum, with a couple of other geezers. I chuck out all the nonces that get out of hand. I only lied to you ’cause I didn’t want you to worry,’ Vinny lied.

Queenie flopped on the sofa. For obvious reasons, she despised nonces. ‘Have you clumped many of the filthy bastards?’

‘Yeah, about ten. That’s why the money’s so good.’

‘So, this mate of yours does the same job as you?’

‘Yeah. He got me the job. Please don’t come down there though, Mum. You’ll make me look a right idiot – they think I’m eighteen. They won’t let you in anyway, as it’s in a downstairs basement. It’s men only, apart from the strippers. They’re bound to guess I’m not eighteen if you and Auntie Viv turn up, then I’ll be sacked on the spot and we’ll have no money again.’

Queenie was deep in thought. The money Vinny was bringing home was more than bloody handy. They could barely survive without it. ‘OK. You can keep the job. But, now I know the truth, I want to meet this friend of yours. Bring him round for lunch one day, or Sunday roast.’

Vinny forced a smile. ‘OK. I’ll ask him. Don’t forget I got a late one tomorrow night. It’s much easier if I can just stay at my pal’s gaff.’

‘I’d rather you come home ’ere no matter what the time.’

Knowing he might be pissed and stoned, Vinny nodded. ‘I’ll do my best to get home, but I don’t know what time the private do finishes.’

‘Don’t you dare touch any of those dirty tarts, Vinny. They’ll be riddled with disease, I’m telling ya. Has any of ’em come on to you yet? I bet they have, with your looks.’

‘One or two, but obviously I told ’em where to go. I wouldn’t touch ’em with a bargepole.’

Smiling, Queenie squeezed Vinny’s hand. ‘You’re a good boy. I’m very proud of you, sorting out those perverts. That lad of Old Jack’s needs a good bleedin’ hiding too.’

‘Jack who owns the cafe?’

‘Yeah. That son of his is a pervert. Been touching up young girls.’

‘I don’t think he’s the full shilling, to be honest.’

‘It doesn’t matter! They’re more dangerous than most, the nonces who ain’t the full shilling.’

‘OK. I’ll have a word with him and give him a dig if necessary. I’m going to bed now, Mum. Love you,’ Vinny said, kissing her goodnight.