‘Well, I can’t think of any other option. I’ll just have to stay here and carry on being bored. Give my regards to the park and the rabbits.’

‘Hmm. Will do.’

Now it’s quiet again. But just as I’m about to turn round and head back to my basket, I catch another distinct whiff of Mr Beck.

‘Hey, Hercules! I’ve just had an idea – but it’s only good for a daring dachshund.’

Well, who else would that be but me?

‘What is it?’ I ask.

‘You remember our trick with the knickers?’

‘How could I ever forget that?’

‘Do you remember how I got inside? Through the tilted window. Now run over to Caroline’s bedroom as fast as you can. Maybe we’ll be in luck and the balcony door is tilted open too. That’s how you’ll get out.’

Only a cat could come up with an idea like that.

‘Beck, your faith in my artistic ability is all well and good, but I can’t do that. Even if the window is tilted open, never in a million years would I fit through. Even though you’re – pardon me for saying this – fat, you can squeeze through tight spaces in a way I’m simply not capable of. I would get caught there, without a doubt.’

‘You have no ambition at all. Let’s at least take a look. I’ll go through the garden to your balcony, and then we’ll size up the situation. It would be great to take an evening stroll together without any humans around.’

Mr Beck – or his smell, at any rate – vanishes. That cat. This is never going to work out. And I’m certainly not bored to the point where I’m willing to risk my neck. On the other hand, some nice roaming about alone at night in the park for a change is of course also a tempting idea. I sigh to myself, then head into the bedroom.

Sure enough, the balcony door is tilted open. Then again, the opening doesn’t begin to widen out until a spot way over my head. Just then, Mr Beck jumps down onto our balcony from the ivy-covered wall outside the building.

‘Well, that does look good!’ he calls over to me cheerfully.

‘What, pray tell, is good about that?’

‘The door is tilted. That’s great.’

‘Yes, but down here I can’t fit through, and I can’t get any higher up. No way will this work.’

’Can’t you jump up there?’

‘No; how could I?’

‘How about if you climb up on the curtain one paw at a time?’

‘Mr Beck, you clearly have the wrong idea about my claws. I can’t use them to hook into anything the way you do. They’re much too straight and smooth for that.’

‘In that case, it’ll be tough.’

‘That’s what I’ve been telling you.’