Lee turns her back to the crowd and begins to shake her hips on beat with the opening notes of Shania Twain’s “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!”

“Let’s go, girls!” The whole bar, myself included, sings along. I don’t even need to close my eyes to easily imagine myself up on that stage.

After Lee’s song, the bartender runs the clipboard up to the stage. “Ahhh,” says Lee. “A few new names and a few old. Let’s kick this off right, y’all, with a dear friend of the Hideaway and everyone’s favorite pizza restaurateur by day, Peppa Roni! Show ’em what you got, Peppa!”

A short, round queen steps onstage and I can quickly imagine what Peppa might look like out of drag, a graying gentleman with a receding hairline and a potbelly. But here, Peppa Roni is basically a living tribute to Miss Piggy herself.

Peppa performs Madonna’s “Like a Virgin,” followed by a surprisingly touching rendition of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” that has me dabbing my eyes before any tears ruin my makeup.

The night is full of ups and downs. Some performers are absolutely tragic and have me drowning in secondhand embarrassment, while others are so good they make me wish I had the courage to get right up there on that stage with them. There’s lip-synching, dancing, and even a little bit of comedy.

Dollar bills fly when each of the queens makes the rounds in the audience. During an especially memorable performance of Taylor Swift’s “Bad Blood” from a muscled and tattooed queen named Snicker Doodle, Snicker focuses in on our table and reaches for me, cupping my chin as she lip-synchs. I feel my whole body being drawn in by her and for a brief moment, it’s like this whole night was orchestrated for me and me alone.

After the show and once a queen (Peppa Roni) has been crowned, I search for the bathrooms.

“Line starts here,” says an older man in a purple silk shirt with the kind of jeans my dad would call “dress jeans.”

“Thanks,” I say, and line up behind him.

“First time?” he asks.

I smile nervously. “Is it that obvious?”

“Nah. Just the kind of place where a new face stands out.”

“Well, I plan on coming back,” I inform him, even though it’s something I’ve only just now decided for myself.

The bathroom lines aren’t defined by gender, but they are equally long, so I just choose one and wait.

Finally, I make it to the front of the line and do my business as quickly as possible. When I walk back out, I collide head-on with someone a little bit taller than me. “Sorry,” I mumble.

And then someone tugs on my hand. It’s Hannah. “There you are,” she says. “Come on. I want to introduce you to Lee.”