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Back Promises of Change
Chapters (53)
  1. Cover
  2. Everyone loves the ladies of Covington!
  3. Also by Joan Medlicott
  4. Title Page
  5. Copyright
  6. Dedication
  7. Acknowledgments
  8. 1
  9. 2
  10. 3
  11. 4
  12. 5
  13. 6
  14. 7
  15. 8
  16. 9
  17. 10
  18. 11
  19. 12
  20. 13
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  22. 15
  23. 16
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  25. 18
  26. 19
  27. 20
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  33. 26
  34. 27
  35. 28
  36. 29
  37. 30
  38. 31
  39. 32
  40. 33
  41. 34
  42. 35
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  44. 37
  45. 38
  46. 39
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  48. 41
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  50. 43
  51. 44
  52. 45
  53. Discussion Questions

Surely by now you realize that I am not fit to be either husband or father. I am leaving. I have no idea where I am going or what I will do. I know you will be cared for in Covington. Should you decide you no longer wish to be married to me and you decide to file for divorce, I will not oppose you. You can send mail to me at Box 99875, San Francisco, CA 99605. Letters will be sent on to me. I have loved you. Never doubt that. I still love you, though I find myself incapable of expressing that love in a healthy manner. I am sorry. I am simply unable to settle down and be the kind of husband and father you and Sarah need, or the kind of son my father wants. Forgive me! I am truly, deeply sorry.

Love, Zack

As Hannah read, Sarina buried her head in her hands. Her shoulders shook. Then she lifted her head and the word “self-reliance” came to mind. Those were the key words in her mother’s advice to all her children.

“Be self-reliant. Learn to stand on your own two feet. Bad things will come to you in this life, and they will pass, for life goes on,” she would say. “If you can be self-reliant, you will make it through whatever life hands you.”

For a moment, anger raced through Sarina. What did her mother know? She had led a sheltered life, going from her father’s protection to her husband’s home and protection. What crisis had she survived? But shame soon replaced her anger. Her mother had buried two stillborn sons. She had lived in England and longed for India. And then there was that terrifying night when the mosque had burned and they had had to flee their home. Her mother had not been pleased to send her away, only her father had.

Still, through it all, her mother had been surrounded by loved ones, strong people like her father and brother. She, Sarina, had been abandoned by a husband in a land far from home with a baby to care for. She could not go home to India. It was intolerable. It was more than she could bear.

When she was able to speak, Sarina said, “I am ashamed. What will I do, Hannah? Where will I go? I cannot take my child without her father to my home in India. They will laugh at me behind my back and inwardly they will scorn me. They will all be thinking, I told her so.”